'Major Movie Star' Trailer as Bad as Expected

November 12, 2007

major-movie-star-trailer.jpg

Questions to ask yourself, and possibly yell at the screen, while watching the trailer to Major Movie Star:

Do you think they told Jessica Simpson she'd be playing a "movie star Britney Spears-like" character, so that she wouldn't catch on that she was playing herself?

Is the "everyone wants a piece of your pie" line meant as double entendre?

Steve Guttenberg? In a movie?

A self-proclaimed "major movie star" is impressed and shocked to learn she has $15 million dollars? Nothing else seems to indicate this takes place in 1950.

Since when does going broke mean you immediately sleep on the street (in front of an Army recruitment center)? Even if she was renting she'd get until the end of the month, right? Does she have no friends? Oh, right, it's to make it perfectly logical that she desperately joins the army.

Are these the jokes?

Is this all an elaborate plan to make Goldie Hawn's Private Benjamin look better?

Why?

This looks awful even by Jessica Simpson standards, which I didn't think existed. Still, I couldn't encourage you more to watch it, and it's under the cut.

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