Apr 8 2009 'Naked Dawn': Rob Schneider's Parodies No More Ridiculous Than Rob Schneider's Real Movies
Thanks to TetterkeT for pointing out this trailer for Naked Dawn, a Red Dawn spoof in which a naked Rob Schneider is a nudist colony's only hope against clothes-loving Russian invaders. With the way your boss is about seeing Rob Schneider's butt, you probably should wait until after work for this:
Nov 11 2008 'Not Another Not Another Movie': A Nightmarish Parody of Parody Movies
Inside Hollywood's womb, something is growing so grotesquely inbred that I have no way of describing its deformed wretchedness. Luckily, the Hollywood Reporter has already laid it out (via The Hater, via Halcyon):
Chevy Chase, Burt Reynolds, Vinnie Jones, Michael Madsen and "Stuttering" John Melendez are spoofing the nonstop flood of spoof films in the upcoming indie comedy "Not Another Not Another Movie."Chase plays a studio head who quits his floundering company, leaving his ex-con sibling (Madsen) in charge. Soon their equally inept gangster friend (Jones) takes over and assigns a production assistant (David Leo Schultz) to direct a spoof of spoof movies. Reynolds plays an actor playing the director of the chaotic film within the film.
Writer-director David Murphy's "Movie" features cameos from actors playing themselves spoofing their memorable roles, including Richard Tyson (the villian in "Kindergarten Cop") and Wolfgang Bodison (the young African-American Marine on trial in "A Few Good Men").
Look, I can understand wanting to make fun of spoof movies and the people who make them. I do it all the time. I just did it yesterday. But I did not make a movie about people making a spoof movie spoofing a spoof movie that spoofs other movies. That's too many layers for society to handle. The fact that you'll (seemingly) be acknowledging that your movie within a movie is terrible does not make it nor the greater movie any less hellish. If one dog barking makes another dog bark, which then makes yet another dog bark, it doesn't matter if the third dog is actually a guy pretending to be a dog, mocking the second dog. In the end, we're still left with more endless, agonizing noise.
Jan 18 2008 'Hell Ride' Poster is Joy Ride for the Eyes! LOL
I hadn't heard of the Tarantino-endorsed Hell Ride until now (only the Wesley Willis-imagined one), but it's already winning points for its cast (clearly chosen to elicit the word "badass") and detailed, hand-drawn poster. Don't look now, but this might replace Wild Hogs as your favorite aging-actor biker movie.
First Look at Tarantino's Hell Ride Poster [Shock Till You Drop]
Apr 24 2007 New Condemned Clip Scrumpliciously Craptacular
Even up here in my ivory tower I can recognize that some movies suck just enough to be kickass. Judging by this latest clip, I think The Condemned might just be one of those movies. It stars Stone Cold Steve Austin and Vinnie Jones, natch.
I think the choreography to that scene went a little something like this:
"Uh, these dudes are both really big and have facial hair, but neither of them know martial arts."
"That's okay, just move the camera around a lot and then blow something up."
By the way, that big guy is Nathan Jones, he's the bad guy from The Protector, another delightfully fartdiculous action movie. Enjoy the flying elephant scene after the jump. You will not be disappointed.
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