- To promote The Sitter, Jonah Hill is taking calls at random at the number listed above. This may be your only chance to be one of a thousand people telling Hill he was funnier when he was fat.
- Pitch Black writer/director David Twohy is working with Alcon Entertainment to make something called The Leonardo Job, a film about two rival master thieves who go to Florence and compete to find a thought-mythical lost painting of Leonardo da Vinci. Not since Adaptation. has a better case been made for a film to contain two Nicolas Cages.
- Twilight Saga studio Summit Entertainment is suing the owner of Twilight.com for allegedly misleading visitors that it is in some way affiliated with the book and film properties. Probably most telling is that Summit thinks Twilight fans will be confused that a banner ad, a link to "Download Twilight Eclipse MP3s," and a note that vintage television fans should purchase The Twilight Zone: The Complete Definitive Collection on DVD is what makes up the official Twilight site.
- HBO has picked up Aaron Sorkin's untitled drama about a cable TV newsroom, which will finally return Sam Waterston back to a weekly series now that his Law & Order time is up. All is right again.
The good thing is, you don't have to be a Twilight fan to enjoy the latest chapter in the series, Breaking Dawn, Part I. You can also just really like stock photography tagged "happy, couple, engagement, white."
- Here's a look at the latest Twilight's devolution into stock photo recreations.
- A new study has shown that going into a story already knowing plot twists and other "spoilers" does not have a negative effect on enjoyment, thus rendering M. Night Shyamalan's catalog completely infallible. (via)
- Morgan Freeman is in talks to play an illusion-exposing ex-magician in Louis Leterrier's magician heist film, Now You See Me. Just imagine how authoritative he'll sound describing how to make a space shuttle disappear.
- The Barefoot Bandit has signed a movie deal with 20th Century Fox that would pay up to $1.3 million of the $1.4 million he owes his victims. Barefoot--real name Colton Harris-Moore--said of the deal, "I have absolutely zero interest in profiting from any of this and I won't make a dime off it." That's what the book deal is for.
Vampiric Michael Sheen smiles ever so smugly... guy-with-a-mustache moves his concerned gaze to the distance... lady-on-a-beach juts her jaw out into what passes as a grin... the mouthbreathing muscular kid takes his shirt off and turns into a wolf, as his muscle memory quietly commands him to do every ten minutes or so...
What single thing could produce such comically diverse reaction shots? An invitation to the wedding of Glittering Vampire and Human Girlfriend, obviously! In the latest chapter of The Twilight Saga, the two are getting married, apparently, finally affording the perpetually sullen couple the freedom to at last have vampire-on-babe sex within the parameters of the author's religion. But with such sexual liberation comes new dangers. Like unplanned, teenage, vampire pregnancy! And how vampires hump so hard they literally destroy buildings.
Seriously, those are the dangers:
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There's something sort of ballsy about eschewing the Twilight poster norm--you know, showing off how glittery and muscular Hair Vampire and Ab Werewolf are, respectively--and going with something a little less blatant. At the same time, there's something sort of incredibly lazy about just going with whatever first pops into your head when you hear the words "Breaking Dawn." Still, fuck it, let's just do that:
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Your long, torturous wait is over, Twilight Fan Club. After holding back for several films--due to vampire bloodlust, werewolf love triangles, obvious sex-before-marriage metaphor, etc.--the two main lovebirds are at last going to stop sitting on their hands and finally fuck each other in the next film in the Twilight saga, Breaking Dawn. Knowing what their audience is after (unconvincing, horror-themed romance), Summit Entertaining has decided to release a shot from that very scene as the first look at the film, answering the question of whether Teen Dracula and Girl's first time be awkward and, at times, shameful, like it is in real life. The answer? NO. It will be beautiful! Told in the delicate language of muted sepia tones and face-stroking, like you'd always imagined.
The box office got incepted so hard this weekend. Here's your top five:
1. Inception - $60.4 million. And people said you couldn't make money on a complex film based on dreaming and constant gunfire.
2. Despicable Me - $32.7 million, pretty much guaranteeing that those little yellow guys will get a primetime sitcom in CBS's fall lineup.
3. The Sorcerer's Apprentice - $17.3 million. It turns out people would still rather enjoy this tale with Mickey and music than Nicolas Cage and the nasally voice of Jay Baruchel.
4. The Twilight Saga: Eclipse - $13.5 million, and a few million more people who now have an actual, informed opinion on the Edward/Jacob debate.
5. Toy Story 3 - $11.7 million, because your kid still insisted on seeing this even though you pointed out to him that he saw that the last four weeks straight--and wouldn't you like to try something else out, champ? No, no, don't cry. Toy Story 3 it is.
Weekend Box Office Results [Box Office Mojo]
1. Despicable Me - $60 million. Everyone realized the movie looked mediocre, but, when faced with ordering a ticket, few could resist the catharsis of saying such a self-deprecating title.
2. The Twilight Saga: Eclipse - While "Twihards" already saw the film last week, this week grossed another $33.4 million with increased ticket sales from Twimoderates.
3. Predators - $25.3 million--not a huge take, but enough to put the sci-fi sequel on its way to make back its relatively meager $40 million budget, which just goes to show that Adrien Brody, Laurence Fishburne, and That '70s Show still don't really make that much.
4. Toy Story 3 - $22 million. Does anyone else find it mildly unsettling to see all the commercials for Toy Story toys? Just think about it.
5. The Last Airbender - $17.1 million, putting the film at over $100 million and proving that no one seems to care whether or not every reviewer says a film is misery on screen.
Weekend Box Office Results [Box Office Mojo]
The Last Airbender
Director: M. Night Shyamalan
Starring: Noah Ringer, Nicola Peltz, Dev Patel
Good if you want to see: the popular Nicktoon turned into Shyamalan's worst-reviewed film yet. Even worse than The Happening, somehow! This guy's a real Downhill Daisy.
The Twilight Saga: Eclipse (technically opened earlier this week, but if you cared, you already knew that)
Director: David Slade
Starring: Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, Taylor Lautner
Good if you want to see: Bella still deciding if she'd rather not have sex with a vampire or a wolf, because, yes, that's still the central conflict.
Love Ranch (limited)
Director: Taylor Hackford
Starring: Helen Mirren, Joe Pesci
Good if you want to see: a husband/wife brothel-running team. Meanwhile, my wife and I can't even agree on which channel to watch the news! - Ray Romano
Great Directors (limited)
Director:Angela Ismailos
Good if you want to see: conversations with talented directors Bernardo Bertolucci, David Lynch, Stephen Frears, Agnes Varda, Ken Loach, Liliana Cavani, Todd Haynes, Catherine Breillat, Richard Linklater, and John Sayles. Brett Ratner was unavailable.
The Agony and the Ecstasy of Phil Spector (limited)
Director: Vikram Jayanti
Good if you want to see: Phil Spector's story of the wall of sound, his wall of hair, his relationship with The Beatles, how he's a murderer, etc.
Nice work, Twihards (fuck, that's a real term now): you've again topped fanboy nerds as the more-obsessive demographic, giving The Twilight Saga: Eclipse the biggest midnight opening ever. There must have been so many tired eyes in Ms. Hamlin's 7th grade class this morning. The film also opened in the widest number of locations ever--4,416--and is expected to open in more Friday, which could push it over Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince's overall record for highest location-count of 4,455. So, if you thought maybe this whole vampire/Twilight thing was puttering out, it's not.
