Jun 3 2009 Posters for 'Scott Pilgrim', 'Shrek Forever After', 'The Number 4 on a Bed of Webbing'

Be the first kid on your block to know that Spider-Man 4 will be using the same font to write the number 4 that they used to write 2 and 3. From the Licensing Show in Las Vegas, where 7-11 and Hardee's wage war over who gets to brand their extra-large soft drink cups with Thor logos, here and here are some posters for upcoming movies that will be made into toys and school binders.

Pay particularly attention to haunting eyes and sinister grins on the poster for Shrek 4, which is now apparently being called Shrek Forever After. What happened to Shrek Goes Fourth? Pick an enraging pun and stick with it, guys.

Sep 4 2008 Tom Cruise Continuing Fun Role Streak with 'Shrek 4'?

Tom Cruise is rumored to be up for the villainous lead in Shr4k 4. See guys? You all thought Tom Cruise was a crazy, high-ranking member of a powerful cult capable of poisoning Katie Holmes both mentally and physically, but you sure were wrong. He's just a fun guy, who likes fun, and doing fun things, like fun bit parts in Tropic Thunder, and fun voices in Shrek. It's just like when everyone thought he was gay, and then, bam, next thing you knew he's having babies with a woman, proving people wrong again--almost as if his entire life is carefully orchestrated to keep him looking favorable in the public eye. But we all know Tom Cruise would never do something like that. He's just too much of a cool, laid-back, fun dude, who might be in S4rek.

Nov 1 2007 Shrek 4 Title Fills Me With Untold Rage

Shrek Goes Fourth!? Shrek Goes Fourth!? Seriously? Jesus.

Somehow they've managed to make the name more annoying than the comedy. They've got to be kicking themselves that such a witty naming scheme was only conceived after the plainly-titled Shrek 2.

So, in honor of Shrek's hilariously non-conventional numbering, here are enough potential titles to take our favorite green mongoloid into the next millennium, when they will undoubtedly still be making Shrek movies.

Shrek is F***ing 5tupid

Shrek Eight a Lot (because he's fat!)

Shrek [Whatever Shrek's Surname is] (Shrek deals with aging)

Shrek X (featuring Shrek as a cyborg)

Dreamworks Plans "Mind," "Shrek 4" [DarkHorizons]