Nov 19 2009 'Remember Me' Trailer: Robert Pattinson Has Movies Besides 'Twilight' Sequels, You Know
Pierce Brosnan is as surprised as you.
See R. Pattinson continue his bad boy boyfriend shtick while trading in sparkly vampirism for throwing things and smoking indoors (so bad!) in this trailer for Remember Me. As a bonus, you'll also get to see Pattinson get his face slammed into the pavement (therapeutic if you're really sick of this whole Twilight thing) and how a former James Bond has transformed into George Hamilton.
Sep 29 2009 'New Moon' Posters: The Most Thorougly Unlikable Collection of Faces
Summit has released some new posters for The Twilight Saga: New Moon, amassing all the main characters in three one-sheets, making it very convenient to decide whose expression deems them most worthy of being slapped in the face over and over and over. Convenient, yes, but definitely not easy. This decision is far from easy. Just when you think the dubious goddammer in the upper-right has it locked, that he's definitely the one to slap and slap and slap, you notice all these guys making a strong case to also be slapped:
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Sep 14 2009 'New Moon' Trailer: Being a Teenage Girl Torn Between Vampire and Werewolf Boyfriends is Rough
The Twilight saga continues! And now there's a vampire king or something! Which is a bit ridiculous, because it isn't Dracula. If a vampire king is named, it's obviously going to be Dracula. Who's going to run against Dracula in a vampire king election? Get with it, Stephenie Meyer.
Anyway, here's the new New Moon trailer, Twilightiacs.
Jun 1 2009 'New Moon' Trailer, Girls
It's Bella's birthday, and you know what that means: time for the annual kiss from her undead boyfriend! It's every girl's dream; the perfect birthday--someone even bought her an intricately decorated cake from a Food Network contest! But when Bella experiences the most dramatic paper cut scene ever committed to film, one that leads to Yacht Club Vampire attacking her, Edward realizes they come from different sides of the vampire tracks. He knows what he must do: abandon her in the forest, home of the Rastafarian vampires who wear colored contacts so that you'll know they're bad guys.
Who will save her birthday now? Answer in the Twilight Saga: New Moon trailer:
May 28 2009 New 'New Moon' Photos: I Get the Sense This 'Twilight' Thing is Being Targeted to a Specific Demographic
Shock Till You Drop has posted 60-some shots from the set of The Twilight Saga: New Moon, and, of course, that means a bunch of photos of shirtless Young Dracula's pale limbs coolly embracing his non-vampire girlfriend. Really giving the people what they wanted. The fans said, "OMG EDWARD + BELLA 4EVER ID LIKE TO SEE HIM SHIRTLESS YUM LOL," and the filmmakers listened. Good to see that even with the change in director, there will still be just as much pandering.
Now time to lie on my stomach across a canopy bed and write out a few glittery diary pages on how I can tell Bella and Edward are still totally in love.
May 19 2009 'New Moon' Poster, Same Rustic Portrait Studio Backdrop
I don't know what it is about this cryptic image, but I get the feeling New Moon might hold some kind of love triangle involving Vampire Luke Perry, Angry Meathead, and Avril Lavigne Protégé. Don't ask me why. I just have this sense that we're finally going to figure out if girls prefer vampires or werewolves to not have sex with.
The Twilight Saga: New Moon Poster [Coming Soon]
Jan 22 2009 Dakota Fanning's Overwhelming Paleness Joining Robert Pattinson's Overwhelming Paleness?
E! Online is reporting that Dakota Fanning is in negotiations to star alongside Robert Pattinson (vampire) and Kristen Stewart (human) in New Moon (that's the Twilight sequel, for those of you who don't READ teen girl vampire romance):
I can exclusively report that the 14-year-old child star—she turns 15 on Feb. 23—is in talks to play Jane opposite Robert Pattinson & Co. in New Moon, the upcoming sequel to box office megahit Twilight.“There were no auditions,” a source reveals. “They just offered it to her outright, and now they’re in negotiations. They’ve been going back and forth.”
Jane is a member of Italy’s Volturi, the most deadly group of bloodsucking killers in author Stephenie Meyer’s best-selling series.
In the casting notice we got our hands on earlier this month, Jane is described as a petite blonde with a “Botticelli angel-like face…[and] crimson irises.” While fellow Volturi guards Demetri & Felix “are three times the size of her, they are terrified of her,” the casting notice reads.
I don't know anything about Twilight aside from how often the vampire guy menacingly stares, but I thought a large part of the reason the studio was loving this series was that its fan base is so insane that they can cast whoever they want, regardless of notoriety or talent, and everyone will still see it, giving the films a huge profit margin. It seems pointless to cast a pricey, acclaimed actress when dubbing a voice over a drawing of Dracula with eyelashes would bring in the same box office numbers. And won't the weight of prosthetic fangs added to her head make her neck vertebrae telescope? Anyone more informed about Twilight/physics have some thoughts on this?
