Jun 5 2008 Meet the Vampires of 'Lost Boys 2'

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Sure, you know Corey Feldman's Edgar Frog character, but do you know the new vampires of Lost Boys 2: The Tribe's vampire tribe? I know you don't. So let me introduce you to them through biographies I've invented based entirely on these photos.

Trey (above) - A sensitive artist with long, flowing hair, puppy dog eyes, and a nose with a urethra, his skills at moody poetry and simple acoustic guitar have coerced many a lady to their untimely death. Trey is often compared to James Blunt because of his similar musical sensibilities, and to Dracula because that's the only other vampire most people can easily think of.

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Mar 12 2008 'Lost Boys 2: The Tribe' Trailer Holds the Haim?

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The strangely earnest introduction from Corey Feldman--in which he somehow says "raise the stakes" with a straight face--does a good job setting the tone for Lost Boys 2: The Tribe, a movie in which lines like "it wasn't wine--it was blood!" are said so soberly that you hardly realize how hilarious it is someone said "it wasn't wine--it was blood!" Plus there's all the vampires, vampire hunting, and Feldman you'd expect from a Lost Boys sequel. Recommended only if you're an obsessive fan of the original, or if you've adapted into a nostalgia-based life-form.

And was it my computer's choppy video playback skipping over him, or was Corey Haim conspicuously missing from this trailer?

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Nov 2 2007 First Look at 'Lost Boys 2' and Corey Feldman

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How you can tell, from just this one image, that Corey Feldman is even more lost/badass in Lost Boys 2 than the original?

1. Stern, accusing finger pointing in the face of defiance. This guy is not taking shit from anyone, especially those who aren't lost. Where have I seen that kind of raw intensity before? Oh yeah: nowhere! Except The Lost Boys and through the vocalization of Donatello.

2. Look at that f'ing headband! You know who wears headbands? Badasses. Rambo, Ryu from Street Fighter, The Karate Kid after he learns karate, and Corey F***in' Feldman. Also, a lot of obnoxious hipsters in my area.

3. Open flannel shirt? Some think the look died with Kurt Cobain. Feldman knows its at timeless as he is.

4. Are you seeing this tattoo creeping up his neck? That isn't ink. That's how Feldman sweats!

I don't know why they're calling this The Lost Boys 2 when it's clear that what we're looking at is a Lost Man.

Gossip Mag Stakes First Lost Boys 2 Photo! [ShockTillYouDrop]