Sep 15 2008 'Smother' Poster Too Artistic For a Dax Shepard Comedy
I'd been wondering what former MTV VJ Kennedy had been up to since Friend or Foe? was canceled. Turns out she's been making a living as the illustrated version of Diane Keaton.
Yeah, I don't know. My Downtown Julie Brown material is a lot better.
Smother Poster [IMPA]
Jun 10 2008 Hear Hulk Say 'Hulk Smash,' Like That Toy With the Voice Backpack Did
As tends to happen, I somehow ended up watching American Gladiators last night, making it the only show I've seen every episode of while putting absolutely no effort into doing so. It's like Wolf's distinctive call (howling like a wolf) transcends the television, letting you know, wherever you are, whatever you might be doing, you should instead be watching over-muscled freaks and common man wage war with foam pads.
In last night's episode---sometime around the twentieth shot of the audience wearing giant green fists, just after the exclusive preview for The Incredible Hulk but prior to the seeing the green-painted Gladiator whose voice was dubbed over with growls--I noticed a subtle theme emerging, and I decided that I was done delivering Hulk news. American Gladiators had now covered every possible aspect of it, and done it far more ridiculously than I could have ever dreamed.
But then I saw this clip where you hear Lou Ferrigno (who was in the American Gladiators audience, incidentally--surprise!) as the voice of the Hulk (which, as I've said, makes total sense), so I thought, what the hell, one more Incredible Hulk thing. Seriously though, this is it.
Continue Reading " Hear Hulk Say 'Hulk Smash,' Like That Toy With the Voice Backpack Did "
Jun 9 2008 'Incredible Hulk' Commercial Exploits 'Iron Man' Popularity
Smart thing done in this new TV commercial for The Incredible Hulk: revealing that Robert Downey Jr. has a brief cameo as Tony Stark, aka Iron Man. Stupid thing done this new TV commercial for The Incredible Hulk: revealing that Liv Tyler acting style is pretending she's a totem honoring meekness. See both chilling reveals below the cut.
Continue Reading " 'Incredible Hulk' Commercial Exploits 'Iron Man' Popularity "
Jun 2 2008 New 'Incredible Hulk' Trailer Both Best and Most Ridiculous
According to AICN, there's currently a new Incredible Hulk trailer being handed out as a promotion at Best Buy. But don't worry, you don't need to leave the house to obtain it--it's on YouTube! This trailer really makes up for the lack of any painfully-long, nearly-laughable, narrated exposition in the previous trailers.
Also: Variety reports Lou Ferigno will be providing the voice of Hulk's primitive cries of "Hulk smash!", which makes sense, since he was the makeup-slathered body of the completely mute Hulk of the '70s show. Or maybe that makes no sense at all.
Continue Reading " New 'Incredible Hulk' Trailer Both Best and Most Ridiculous "
May 20 2008 Yet Another 'The Strangers' Poster, Stranger
The new The Stangers poster: giving you something to gesture at when you tell the ticket vendor, "I want to see that one with the bleeding, traumatized woman."
New Strangers poster! [JoBlo]
May 14 2008 New 'Incredible Hulk' Trailer Emerges from Earth's Crust
When the new Hulk movie was announced, it was emphasized that this was a reboot of the franchise. Forget the Ang Lee Hulk; this is all new, by someone less respected than Ang Lee. So why is this new trailer stressing that this is the return of the "most powerful superhero on Earth," as if it's a sequel? And why is it so heavily-implied that Hulk is born of the Earth's crust? Is there a new, stupider origin story I don't know about? If I hadn't already bought the green body paint, I've be strongly reconsidering camping outside a theater in-costume for this.
Continue Reading " New 'Incredible Hulk' Trailer Emerges from Earth's Crust "
May 14 2008 'The Strangers' Poster Provides the Motive
"Because you were home" seems like a pretty loose reason to kill. Here are some other nearly-as-arbitrary reasons the strangers might murder you:
- Because we live below you, and you were playing Dance Dance Revolution all night.
- Because you've been sitting on our Facebook friend request for like a week; as if you haven't been online.
- Because you didn't pick up your wiener poopie. You were warned.
- Because we had these masks sitting around, and we've had a few wine coolers.
- Because Scrubs was a rerun tonight, giving us an open half-hour.
- Because Jersey Girl was shit, Tyler.
- Rap music.
The Strangers Poster [IMPA]
Apr 30 2008 'Incredible Hulk' Trailer is Incredibly Dull--Except for the Part with the Power Suit
After watching this new trailer to the Edward Norton-starring remake of The Incredible Hulk, I can safely say it's not worth talking about. There's no reason to continue discussing it. It's not good; it's not bad; it's just nothing. It's everything you'd expect it to be and slightly less. So instead of wasting my time attempting to describe it to you, I've taken IMDB's summary for a far superior Hulk movie, Suburban Commando, and adapted it to fit this mundane trailer. It works well enough.
[Edward Norton] is an interstellar hero, righting wrongs, etc. His [skin] is [green] after a [gamma irradiation] with a [government] nasty and he must hide out on [Brazil?] until [he] can [cure that]. He leaves his [Liv Tyler] at home, but still finds himself unable to [stop turning into the Hulk and whatnot] and so mixes it up with bad [Gen. William Hurt], offensive paperboys, [another giant green asshole] and the like. Then the family he's staying with finds his power suit and the father tries it on.
See it in HD here, or slightly more conveniently below the cut. (Thanks to Kyle and Joe.)
Apr 24 2008 'The Strangers' Poster is Scarier Than Sitting on Your Hand for 20 Minutes and...
We tell ourselves there's nothing to fear... but sometimes we're wrong. Sometimes, when we're standing stiffly in the middle of the living room, pointing at our bare feet, the Scarecrow is hiding behind us in the shadows, right by the upright piano we have in our vacation cabin. It's a terrifying thought.
The Strangers Poster [Worst Preview]
Mar 14 2008 'Strangers' Trailer Becomes an Acquaintance
I just got back from the Harvey Dent campaign trail, so there will be a full report coming shortly. In the meantime, here's a trailer for The Strangers, a new horror film in which Liv Tyler and Scott Speedman are terrorized by three masked assailants. To make things worse, they don't even know these perpetrators! (They're strangers.)
Continue Reading " 'Strangers' Trailer Becomes an Acquaintance "
Mar 13 2008 'Incredible Hulk' Trailer
Judging by its trailer, The Incredible Hulk may not go down as the franchise watershed moment that Batman Begins was--in fact, I'm pretty positive it won't. But at least it's got a couple giant green freaks fighting each other in the streets of Manhattan, and that's something. Hopefully it won't go the Ang Lee route and include comic panel transitions, lest we momentarily forget we're watching a comic book turned into a movie. If you didn't catch it on every single Viacom station last night, watch the new trailer, below the cut.
