Mar 16 2009 More Exciting Word Choice Proves Effective for 'Race to Witch Mountain'
The box office this weekend:
1. Race to Witch Mountain - $25 million. My primitive mind found this version much more exciting than the original because the word "escape" had been switched to "race". You know--like RACING?
2. Watchmen - $18.1 million. Audience numbers dropped 67% this week following accusations that some male audience members were "looking." Dude, I was so not looking. You were looking.
3. The Last House on the Left - $14.7 million. Not everyone wanted to see a guy's head cooked in a microwave. Why would that be?
4. Taken - $6.7 million. Seriously, have you been TAKEN? I'm going to keep asking until you are.
5. Tyler Perry's Madea Goes to Jail - $5.1 million. I can't be the only one waiting for Tyler Perry's Madea's Le Trou.
Weekend Box Office Results [Box Office Mojo]
Feb 10 2009 'Last House on the Left' Poster: Here's that House (the last one on the left)
What the eff is that attached shed on the house's west wall? That's so like Hollywood remakes, unnecessarily updating the classics, completely ignoring my "use the exact same last house on the left as in the original Last House on the Left or I'll never see it" petition.
The Last House on the Left Poster! [Shock Till You Drop]
Jan 9 2009 'Last House on the Left' Trailer
There have been so many completely unnecessary remakes of older horror films that it's easy to sweep them all into a neat pile where you can shout "stop it!" to all of them at once, but I have to admit that the trailer to Last House on the Left--which includes a strange, unexpected cover of "Sweet Child o' Mine" by the The Concretes' lead singer--seems pretty tense. Unfortunately, it also reveals so much of the conflict and resolution that I can't imagine what more I would get out of seeing full film. Already knowing an antagonist's head is cooked in the microwave, I'll just be waiting for that the whole time. It will be another King Kong, where I spent over an hour waiting for Kong to rip open the jaw of a dinosaur and the rest of the movie waiting for a replay.
