Feb 11 2008 'Fool's Gold' Wins Weekend, Tanned Ab Award

Given the choice of a loose treasure hunting premise constructed solely as a background to an even looser comedy-romance, a joint concert performed by a fictional television character and an actual human, and something with Martin Lawrence where at least one joke is based on how unsightly fat women are, what would America choose? Despite what you might think, the answer is not death.

1. Fool's Gold - Took in $22 million, and created the most excitement for tans, blonde hair, and abs since Hulkamania.

2. Welcome Home Roscoe Jenkins - A powerful $17.1 million weekend proved this is indeed Martin Lawrence's Garden State.

3. Hannah Montana/Miley Cyrus: Best of Both Worlds Concert Tour - A $10.5 million weekend inspired father Billy Ray to put together a Clint 'Doc' Cassidy/Billy Ray Cyrus: Curing That Achy-Breaky Heart Tour.

4. The Eye - Though many theaters, due to a lack of prints, showed The Grudge instead, the film still made $6.6 million and no one seemed to notice or care.

5. Juno - $5.7 million--honest to blog! Get it? Like that line in the movie.

Weekend Box Office Estimates [Box Office Mojo]

Jan 21 2008 'Cloverfield' Wins Weekend Box Office

1. Cloverfield - With $41 million, it really stomped the competition! Or how about, a monstrous win for Cloverfield? Or maybe, Cloverfield's weekend not as shaky as its camera? Cloverfield doesn't need its hand-held to win weekend? Whichever is most ridiculous.

2. 27 Dresses - $22.4 million, or about $830,000 per dress.

3. The Bucket List - Another $15.2 million proved it's the hot destination for baby boomers looking for something without "that awful shaky camera."

4. Juno - With another $10.3 million, next year's "this year's Little Miss Sunshine" will now be "this year's Juno," which is this year's Little Miss Sunshine.

5. National Treasure: Book of Secrets - Y'say Ghos' Rider is back hunnin' fer treasure?! Shoot, I'd collectively pay $8.1 million t'see that, y'all!

Conspicuously absent, but deservedly so: Mad Money, Alvin and the Chipmunks (finally).

Weekend Box Office Estimates [Box Office Mojo]

Jan 14 2008 Empty Nesters Weekend Box Office For 'Bucket List'

1. The Bucket List - $19.5 million. With no new episodes of CSI, everyone's parents went out this weekend.

2. First Sunday - Will a $19 million opening be enough to warrant Second Sunday After Next?

3. Juno - The quirky but charming gross of $14 million.

4. National Treasure: Book of Secrets - If you're able to suspend your disbelief that this could make another $11.5 million, you're the perfect audience for this movie.

5. Alvin and the Chipmunks - Still here, and making $9.1 million.

Weekend Box Office [Box Office Mojo]

Jan 9 2008 Free Screenplays to 'No Country', 'Juno', and More

Want to see how much The Darjeeling Limited deviated from the original screenplay? Feel the need to accurately recreate scenes from Juno on YouTube? Want to know how the Coen Brothers spell your favorite new informal address, "friendo"? (That's how.) Right now, you can download the screenplays to these and other Best Screenplay hopefuls on the Miramax and Fox Searchlight websites, just begging for someone to remake The Savages with dubbed-over cats.

Jan 7 2008 Weekend Box Office: 'National Treasure' Again?

1. National Treasure: Book of Secrets - $20.2 million more to the best Nicolas Cage movie since his last piece of shit.

2. I Am Legend - Yeah, I know you're legend, Will Smith. Have another $16.3 million and shut up about it.

3. Juno - Wait, it made $16.2 million and beat Alvin and the Chipmunks? It's almost as if good taste and logic have persevered over an irrational love for creepy singing chipmunks.

4. Alvin and the Chipmunks - $16 million, because there's still an irrational love for creepy singing chipmunks.

5. One Missed Call - Being the only new release, and playing off the nation's collective phobia of possibly missing a single call, helped it bring in $13.5 million.

Weekend Box Office [Box Office Mojo]

Jan 2 2008 'National Treasure' Wins Another Weekend, Somehow

1. National Treasure: Book of Secrets - Like Indiana Jones, but with a more ludicrous MacGuffin than even the Holy Grail; $35.6 million.

2. Alvin and the Chipmunks - "How about that chipmunk one, where the chipmunks are all really creepy and obnoxious? Let's see that one." Enough people said this that it accumulated $29.1 million over the weekend.

3. I Am Legend - Made $27.3 million despite recent rumors that Will Smith is Hitler.

4. Charlie Wilson's War - If I understand correctly, Charlie Wilson is to war as Merv Griffin is to Crosswords, though I don't know what that actually means; $12 million.

5. Juno - The most talked-about teen pregnancy film since the bizarre one you had to watch in 8th grade sex ed. made $10.6 million.

Weekend Box Office [Box Office Mojo]

Dec 10 2007 Weekend Box Office: 'Golden Compass' Wins, Still Does Horribly

1. The Golden Compass - A disappointing $26.1 million weekend proves it takes more than Nicole Kidman, epic battles, and armored CGI polar bear fights to bring in audiences. It also takes a giant robot polar bear that totally eats the shit out of every other polar bear.

2. Enchanted - I can't figure out why America paid $10.7 million to see a fairy tale princess in the real world when we've already had one. Rest in peace, Diana!

3. This Christmas - Why talk about the $5 million weekend gross when Chris Brown could sing about it?

4. Fred Claus - $4.7 million worth of recommendations to not see Fred Claus.

5. Beowulf - After taking in another $4.4 million, what's next for Beowulf? Answer: NEOwulf!

Honorable Mention: Juno only made $420,000, but it only played on seven screens, so that's nutso.

Weekend Box Office Results [Box Office Mojo]

Nov 30 2007 'Juno' International Trailer Still Overwhelmingly Clever

With all the hugely-positive reviews, movie of the year mentions, and comparisons to indie-smash Little Miss Sunshine (presupposing that Little Miss Sunshine is God), it's practically sacrilege not to dump praise over Juno like it just won a football game.

Isn't anyone else sort of put off by how uber-witty and pop-culture driven most of the dialogue is, and how it's delivered so unbelievably dryly? This international trailer did nothing to curb my fears that it's basically a well-shot Friends episode, where everyone has clever reactions to every possible situation, yet everyone seems unaffected by the constant barrage of witticisms.

Then again, it was great pretty much every time Jason Bateman or Michael Cera were onscreen, so maybe I'll withhold some judgement until I see it, or at least until I'm inundated with people quoting lines.

Juno International Trailer [/Film]

Oct 31 2007 AM Poster Post: 'Juno' Great for Pregnancy Fetishists

I can't believe I used to fear getting a girl pregnant in high school, when it turns out it's a really quirky, indie thing to do. As seen here, a child growing inside a young womb can bring about such things as Arrested Development's Michael Cera, cute hand lettering, and praise from Roger Ebert. And if you get her preggers enough, I've heard indie music even plays and things go slow motion.

Juno Poster [IMPA]

Oct 23 2007 Some Other Crap That Happened...

- Data and Chunk have confirmed what Mikey and Mouth already told us: that they've been contacted to do voices for an animated Goonies movie, also confirming--what was once thought a rumor--that Chunk ate his weight in Godfather's pizza. [Empire]

- Diablo Cody seems to be the new 'it' screenwriter, with the Juno penner working on a burlesque musical, a Steven Spielberg television series (United States of Tara), and now a comedic supernatural thriller titled Jennifer's Body. I find myself somewhat embittered that someone named Diablo Cody is having so much more success than me. [/Film]

- Zooey Deschanel has joined Jim Carrey in Yes Man, about a man who decides to change his life by saying yes to everything. Hey, that sounds like what Owen Wilson says to do in The Darjeeling Limited, except much stupider. [Hollywood Reporter]

- Producer Brian Glazer and director Ridley Scott talked to MTV about their Russell Crowe-starrer, Nottingham, calling it, "the Gladiator version of Robin Hood." I guess that makes Kevin Costner's Prince of Thieves the "Field of Dreams version of Robin Hood." [MTV]

Sep 17 2007 Juno Trailer Wins Every Award

Despite having only debuted at a couple film festivals this month, the trailer alone for the hip dramedy Juno has already unofficially won every award outside of the Oscars, which will probably go to something by Clint Eastwood. Watch the funny yet heartwarming, poignant yet lighthearted trailer and you'll see why this is already a critical darling, even though most critics haven't seen it. Thank You for Smoking director Jason Reitman has taken elements of every indie hit from the last five years and melded it together into an IFC Frankenstein. It's impossible to watch this two-and-a-half minutes of footage without immediately giving it an award and adding it to your yearly top ten list.