Nov 3 2009 'Prince of Persia' Trailer: Jake Gyllenhaal Finds the Slow Motion Knife!
Massive CGI landscapes; vague, unplaceable accents; nonstop exposition; an utter lack of any sort of chemistry between "romantic" leads; jumping. If those are things you look for in a film, you are going to love this trailer for Prince of Persia. If not, then, well... prepare to have your eyes stained bronze for a few minutes.
Continue Reading " 'Prince of Persia' Trailer: Jake Gyllenhaal Finds the Slow Motion Knife! "
Jul 20 2009 'Prince of Persia' Posters: Jake Gyllenhaal Wants to Believe
Both evocative of The X-Files: Fight the Future and some kind of Arabian Nights-themed unisex cologne. Well done, Disney. Once I figure out the right image isn't the cover of a fashion magazine called "DESTINY," I'll probably be really excited to see this movie.
High-res versions here.
Jul 10 2009 'Brothers' Poster: Time to Learn the Two Extremely Specific Sides of Every Family
There are two sides to every family: the side on which naked Tobey Maguire shuns Natalie Portman's intense back adoration, and the side where Jake Gyllenhaal thinks, "Man, I never get invited to the back-kissin' party. I wonder whose backs-of-heads these are, anyway." If your family is missing one or both of those sides, sorry, but you aren't a real family.
'Brothers' Poster Premiere [Cinematical]
Jul 6 2009 'Brothers' Trailer: No, Not the Movie About the Reunited Tiger Cubs
When news comes back that Tobey Maguire has died in the line of duty, brother Jake Gyllenhaal makes sure he really "takes care" of the widowed Natalie Portman. Yeah, that's right, "takes care" with quotes. (Sex.) Which wouldn't be such a big deal, except it turns out Maguire has survived! He's home! He's making intense, award-baiting faces! And he's understandably displeased with the whole wife-sleeping-with-his-brother thing.
I can't believe the trailer gives away the shot where he turns into Vader:
Continue Reading " 'Brothers' Trailer: No, Not the Movie About the Reunited Tiger Cubs "
May 11 2009 This Prince of Persia Sure Is Fighting Some Guys
I remember reading somewhere that, prior to shooting Batman Begins, Christopher Nolan showed some of his crew Blade Runner to show them the look and feel he hoped to infuse into his superhero franchise.
Similarly, judging by these Prince of Persia clips, I'm guessing that tortoise-headed producer Jerry Bruckheimer showed his crew Aladdin and said, "Alright, make that, but also make Gladiator--and the Prince of Persia should fight a guy with Wolverine claws."
Continue Reading " This Prince of Persia Sure Is Fighting Some Guys "
Mar 9 2009 'Prince of Persia' Patiently Waits for His Chest Groomer
You have to give Jake Gyllenhaal some credit. He looks pretty relaxed for a guy clad only in chains and a grunge wig, about to make what will likely be another in the steady stream of forgettable if not awful video game-based movies. That's great acting. Or maybe he's looking to this guy for support.
(Thanks, Greg.)
Feb 27 2009 Carrey, Gyllenhaal Are Damn Yankees
Grandma's always like, "Let's watch the the 1958 musical Damn Yankees!" and you inevitably respond, "But Grandma, I'm young; I only want to watch Ace Venture: Pet Detective!" It's so hard to meet halfway with movie viewing in your Family Matters-esque grandma-present home. Until now! From Variety:
New Line Cinema is playing ball with Jim Carrey and Jake Gyllenhaal on "Damn Yankees," attaching both actors to star in a contemporized film transfer of the classic musical."Damn Yankees," which bowed on Broadway in 1955 and won seven Tony Awards, focuses on Joe Boyd, a happily married middle-aged man whose devotion to a hapless pro baseball team prompts him to make a Faustian bargain with the devil to help the team. He's transformed into slugger Joe Hardy, in exchange for Boyd's soul. Boyd can break the deal, but the deadline occurs during the World Series. For good measure, the devil engages Lola, a gorgeous lost soul, to seduce the slugger and seal his fate.
The plan is for Carrey to play the devil, and Gyllenhaal to play Boyd. It's the first musical for each.
Can we get some kind of assurance that Carrey will wear Grinch-like prosthetics for his part? I feel like that's still needed to fully push this past the realm of good sense. Either that or the announcement that actual Yankee A-Rod will co-star as part of a rehabilitation agreement.
Aug 12 2008 Jake Gyllenhaal Makes His Way to Comic-Con
JustJared has managed to get an early look at Jake Gyllenhaal wandering the set of Prince of Persia as Dastan, the titular prince. Something about this is entirely ridiculous (the grunge/caveman hair?), but well, I guess I can't say it's inaccurate:
May 20 2008 Gyllenhaal, Arterton Join 'Prince of Persia', Because They're Both Clearly From That Region
After Alone in the Dark, BloodRayne, Dead or Alive, Doom, Double Dragon, Hitman, House of the Dead, Dungeon Siege, Super Mario Bros., Mortal Kombat, Resident Evil, Street Fighter, Tomb Raider, and Wing Commander, you'd think it would be getting pretty hard to find respectable actors willing to risk their reputation on a video game adaptation. Yet, for whatever reason, Jake Gyllenhaal and Bond girl up-and-comer Gemma Arterton have reportedly been persuaded to star in Jerry Bruckheimer's Prince of Persia. I suspect the cacophony of cash register bells that went off when they heard how much they'd get paid played a large part in the decision, but we can pretend it was that the director of Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire and Love in the Time of Cholera (also, Mona Lisa Smile) is at the helm, giving Prince a slight edge over the usual Uwe Boll fare.
I haven't played the Prince of Persia games, so could someone tell me if there's a legitimate reason why blatant caucasians are playing the roles of Persian royalty? Is it like The Love Guru, where it's explained early on that he's actually a white American raised there, and thus not the new Charlie Chan, or are we just using Alec Guinness in Lawrence of Arabia as a standard now?
Nov 28 2007 Gyllenhaal to Play Broadway Joe
Variety reports that Jake Gyllenhaal has been tapped to play Joe Namath in a feature biopic on the Hall of Fame quarterback, but is it a good match? Let's decide by taking a comparative look at the two stars.
Namath: Launched Jets to AFL stardom.
Gyllenhaal: Launched rockets in October Sky.
Namath: Knees nearly destroyed from overuse.
Gyllenhaal: Knees lightly rug burnt from repeated Brokeback Mountain takes.
Namath: Shaved by Farrah Fawcett for popular shaving cream commercial.
Gyllenhaal: Probably shaved Lance Armstrong for greater aerodynamics while biking.
Namath: First football player to wear full-length fur coat on sidelines.
Gyllenhaal: First actor to wear beard on face and arm (burn!).
Namath: Famously disappointed the Baltimore Colts with an upset win in the 1969 Championship Game.
Gyllenhaal: Famously disappointed everyone by following up Donnie Darko with 2001's Bubble Boy.
Results: close enough.
Gyllenhaal tapped for Namath film [Variety]
Nov 5 2007 Some Other Crap That Happened...
- Comedian Zach Galifianakis has nabbed roles as Ashton Kutcher's best friend in What Happens in Vegas... and as a government scientist in charge of a guinea pig commando program in G-Force. This gives me an excuse to post one of my favorite things ever. [Hollywood Reporter]
- Sylvester Stallone is in talks to direct and star as a man turned vigilante after his family is attacked in a remake of Death Wish, a title begging for jokes about his age. [Variety]
- Jake Gyllenhaal and Jessica Biel have joined David O. Russell's political satire about a woman shot in the head with a nailgun, giving her wild sexual urges, and the immoral congressman who takes advantage. Is it wrong that I'm most excited at the possibility of more videos of Russell freaking out on people? [Hollywood Reporter]
- Hayden Christensen will star in Beast of Bataan, playing the attorney to Masaharu Homma, the Japanese general implicated in the Bataan Death March. How tasteless will it be when they play Beast of Burden in the trailer? [Hollywood Reporter]
Oct 9 2007 Jake Gyllenhaal Playing Moon Lander
Variety announced Jake Gyllenhaal will star in an yet-untitled action film involving a race to colonize the moon. I don't know what director Doug Liman will call this gem, but here are the titles Star magazine is surely brainstorming at this very moment:
- Brokeback Lunar Mountain Range
- Donnie Dark-Side-of-the-Moon-O
- October Sky, November Space, December Moon
- Bubble Boy 2: Bubble Man (on the Moon)
- Buzz Gyllenhaaldrin
Did I miss any?
Jake Gyllenhaal flies to the 'Moon' [Variety]
Oct 3 2007 Some Other Crap That Happened...
- More pictures from the Sex and the City set reveal Carrie appears to be marrying Mr. Big in the same garish, over-the-top manner as the rest of the show. [The Superficial]
- Rumor is spreading that McG, director of the Charlie's Angels franchise, is attached to direct Terminator 4. Just as soon as he can find a way to stretch cute boy underwear over liquid metal. [CHUD]
- IMDB added a new character profiles to the database, allowing users to see who has played a particular character and in what films or shows the character has appeared. This will aid me in my quest to see every movie featuring the character of "topless slut." [IMDB]
- Gullermo del Toro may finally get to shoot his passion project, At the Mountains of Madness, adapted from the Lovecraft novel. This drastically decreases my hopes of seeing a reality series about that Pan's Labyrinth guy with the eyes in his hands. [Latino Review]
- Natalie Portman will star in Brothers alongside Jake Gyllenhaal and Tobey Maguire, who play some sort of blood relatives. [Variety]
- Over 2,000 production stills, production budget, breakdowns, and other top-secret materials were stolen from the set of Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. TMZ will have the Jones Sex Tape posted within the hour. [IESB]
