Sep 28 2009 Roman Polanski: CAPTURED!
In case you didn't hear the news, don't expect Roman Polanski to be home for dinner tonight. The 76-year-old director of Rosemary's Baby, Chinatown, and The Pianist was finally taken into custody in Switzerland yesterday on an arrest warrant from his 1977 charges of "giving a 13-year-old some champagne and quaalude and doin' 'er."
Now Polanski--who's been hiding out in France since the '70s, laying low by making Academy Award-winning films--may face extradition to the US, where his crime would certainly be dealt with one or another. Trial? Appeal? Formal pardon? Probably none of the above. If I know America, this sounds like a case so complicated it can only be settled with vigilante justice. At least if Toby Keith has his say.
Sep 11 2009 'Takers' Trailer: These Guys Have Such Explosion Apathy They Must Be Awesome
Did all the cut-and-pasted heads on the Takers poster get you super worked up to see why Hayden Christensen was dressed up like a high-class rude boy? Of course it did. And now you can sate that desire with this trailer for the generic heist film.
In the film, The Wire's Idris Elba leads a crew of rappers (T.I.), singing domestic abusers (Chris Brown), Jedi (Christensen), and Paul Walkers (Paul Walker) in the robbery of somewhere between $25 and $30 million. But it won't be easy: Matt Dillon is on the case to stop them! I doubt he does, though. Have you seen this heist crew? They casually walk away from exploding helicopters! That's the criterion for bad-ass dudes. At least until someone comes up with something even more awesomely dangerous to nonchalantly stroll away from. Maybe a Tyrannosaurus holding a samurai sword?
Continue Reading " 'Takers' Trailer: These Guys Have Such Explosion Apathy They Must Be Awesome "
Jun 23 2009 'Sherlock Holmes' Posters: Holmes has Twilight Hair
From the same desaturated universe as Harry Potter, here come the Sherlock Holmes character posters. I have to say, I'm pretty disappointed about the move away from advertising Holmes as a brooding Tom Petty. Which look am I supposed to wear when I'm standing in line opening night?
New Sherlock Holmes Posters [Empire]
May 28 2009 The Nicolas Cage Version of 'Bad Lieutenant' Has a Trailer, Favorite Crack Pipe
Calling this Werner Herzog-directed Bad Lieutenant a "remake" of the 1992 Abel Ferrara, Harvey Keitel-starring film isn't an entirely accurate description of what you're going to see in this trailer. This is more like someone dug up a lost promo for an "edgy" USA original series that stars Nicolas Cage as "a cop who breaks ALL the rules" and Val Kilmer as his straight-laced bayou partner, and is a terrible show that needs to be canceled:
Continue Reading " The Nicolas Cage Version of 'Bad Lieutenant' Has a Trailer, Favorite Crack Pipe "
May 19 2009 'Sherlock Holmes' Trailer: It's a Fun One
I try not to ever say a movie "looks like a fun one." That's how my grandparents used to describe movies, and I hoped to never devolve to such a simplistic level of critique that judges all films as "fun ones," "renters," or head shakes and disgusted sighs. But I see no other way to describe Guy Ritchie's Sherlock Holmes. It genuinely looks like a "fun one." And not like a Transformers fun one, where enjoying the scant moments of fun means pushing aside all the aggravating, brain-hurting, often nonsensical events that led you there. A genuine fun one. Non-Crystal Skull Indiana Jones type fun.
The trailer:
Continue Reading " 'Sherlock Holmes' Trailer: It's a Fun One "
May 6 2009 More From That 'Sherlock Holmes' Detective Man Movie
Though Data and Geordi in the Enterprise holodeck will always be my go-to Sherlock Holmes point of reference, because I'm a nerd, USA Today's article and accompanying photo set covering Guy Ritchie's take on the famous detective have given me some renewed interest in the action-adventure reinterpretation. Even producer Joel Silver's quote, "Audiences are interested in seeing something they know," wasn't quite enough to discourage me about this project. You can't fault him for being depressingly honest.
Apr 30 2009 Who Framed Roger Rabbit This Second Time He's Being Framed?
Now that we have digital tools and performance capture, the power to re-create the effects of a 20-year-old movie is at our fingertips. Time to make another sequel to a decades-old film. From MTV:
[W]hen MTV News caught up with director Robert Zemeckis recently, he dropped a news bomb that had our eyes popping cartoon-style out of our sockets. “I’ll tell you what is buzzing around in my head now that we have the ability—the digital tools, performance capture—I’m starting to think about ‘Roger Rabbit,’” he told us.
I have no idea what performance capture would have to do with animating a madcap, intentionally cartoonish, animated rabbit. It sounds like you're planning to ruin things, Robert Zemeckis. Please don't motion capture Tom Hanks to animate Roger Rabbit.
Besides, clearly HD TVs and Blu-ray are the more impressive technologies when talking about a Roger Rabbit sequel. It's going to look so good when I meticulously, frame-by-frame, step through the movie looking for any possible Jessica Rabbit upskirts.
Apr 23 2009 'Brothers Bloom' Intro is Year's Best Mash-Up
If Paul Thomas Anderson directed a Wes Anderson script, the seven minute opening to Rian Johnson's The Brothers Bloom would inevitably be the result. The Ricky Jay narration and frequent, dramatic camera push-ins of PTA have merged with the precocious, costumed children and slow-motion walking-to-music requirements of the Wes. When the two directors get to their daily afternoon Hulu watching session, they're going to spit take in each others faces at this:
Continue Reading " 'Brothers Bloom' Intro is Year's Best Mash-Up "
Apr 13 2009 Hand-Drawny 'Brothers Bloom' Poster
The Brothers Bloom has been on my movies-I'll-put-forth-effort-to-see radar since the trailer debuted last year, and now writer/director Rian Johnson (Brick!) has revitalized my interest for the May release with a new, hand-drawn poster by his cousin. I'd say the stylized, purposefully antiquated take on the floating heads standard is pretty charming, even if Adrien Brody does look like he belongs in the background of a Scorsese film. Well done, Zach Johnson.
And here's a newish trailer:
Mar 16 2009 Gary Oldman and Bono Hate 'The Perfect Sleep'
We've gone so long without solidarity among Gary Oldman, Bono, and mixed-martial arts star Bas Rutten that I'd started to wonder if it would ever happen. Until now, that is! Finally a cause has emerged that the bad guy from Fifth Element, the singer of The Sweetest Thing, and a professional puncher/strangler can get behind: fake-hating the new film The Perfect Sleep even though none of them are in it. And just to prove the like-mindedness of their fraternity, there's a video:
Continue Reading " Gary Oldman and Bono Hate 'The Perfect Sleep' "
Mar 3 2009 Public Enemies/Private Parts Poster
Only slightly more subtle than an arrow that says, "Hey, ladies, Johnny Depp's crotch is in this!"
New Public Enemies Poster [Coming Soon]
Feb 17 2009 Halle Berry Playing a Really Great Jewel Thief Again
In spite of a poorly-received showing last time she was allowed to tackle the criminal profession, Halle Berry will once again play a jewel thief in a movie, says the Variety:
Halle Berry has become attached to star in "Who Is Doris Payne," a Eunetta Boone-scripted fact-based film about an international jewel thief whose career spanned five decades.The project is being developed by J2 partners Justin Berfield and Jason Felts. That duo just got their first pilot pickup when Fox Broadcasting greenlit "Sons of Tucson," bringing Berfield back to Fox for the first time since he starred as Reese in "Malcolm in the Middle."
Even with the cat-burglary similarity, I wouldn't worry too much about Doris Payne bearing much resemblance to Catwoman. After all, this isn't some silly comic book movie--this film is fact-based. For example, have you ever heard the fact that a drowned woman can sometimes be revived by the messenger-cat of the Egyptian goddess Bast, bestowing upon her powers of cat-like reflexes and agility? Maybe it will be based on that fact. Who knows!
Feb 4 2009 Jude Law Secretly 'Designing Women' Cast Member
Actually, the above shot comes from Rage, an upcoming murder mystery in which the actor plays a transvestite supermodel. It's amazing how much eyeliner some guys will pile on to plead for an Oscar nomination.
Jude Law Plays A Transvestite Supermodel [Huffington Post]
Jan 14 2009 Bruce Willis Adding TV Job to Current Movie Job Schedule?
Bruce Willis returning to television for a Moonlighting movie reunion? Maybe!
The creator of "Moonlighting" was Glenn Gordon Caron, and a little bird tells us that Caron is hot to reunite Cybill and Bruce for a 20th anniversary "Moonlighting" TV movie. The most surprising aspect of this is that Bruce Willis, who went on to become one of the biggest movie stars in the world (still is), has shown definite interest. An insider says, "Bruce is ready to give it a go. He still holds a lot of fondness for the show."And, if a "Moonlighting" reunion gets off the ground, there is only one demand both Bruce and Cybill will make -- that Caron have creative control. Bringing David and Maddie back to life so many years later will be a daunting task. The stars feel only Caron can get it right.
Die Hard 4 is one thing, but going back to the '80s television role that made him famous? Come on. That's like Bronson Pinchot returning to Perfect Strangers--he is way too big a star (you know, after Beverly Hills Cop and that thing with John Larroquette and psychic powers).
Still, I can't wait to tell all my girlfriends on the CafeMom forums. They're going to be so excited.
Jan 13 2009 'Next Day Air' Trailer: A Cautionary Tale of Sending Huge Drug Shipments Through Overnight Delivery
Oh, man, Turk from Scrubs is in so deep. Some dudes decided to send a washing machine-sized box of cocaine through the overnight delivery service Turk works for (standard way to move huge amounts of contraband), only Turk delivers it to the wrong apartment--the apartment of Avon Barksdale! And if you've seen The Wire, you know that guy is not going to sit on a box of drugs for too long, because he's great at selling drugs in The Wire. So Avon sells the drugs, some guys come after Turk, they confuse him with Mos Def, hot ladies are sometimes present, etc. Basically it's like someone told Guy Ritchie to make what he thought a Friday movie might look like:
Dec 12 2008 This 'Brothers Bloom' is Taking FOREVER
Remember how good The Brothers Bloom looks? In August, when the trailer came out, I was so ready to let this movie kiss me come January. Now I apparently have to wait even longer. Writer/director Rian Johnson has confirmed on his message board that the film has been pushed back to May:
Summit is announcing today that they're pushing Bloom to limited on May 15th, wide on May 29th. January is crowded with an insane amount of Oscar movies (some being released, some expanding) and Summit decided that Bloom would play better as counter-programming to a few summer movies than to a few dozen oscar ones.I'd be lying if I didn't admit to being bummed. I want you guys to see the movie, it feels a little like I've been movie-pregnant for 9 months and my movie-doctor has just told me he'd like me to wait another 6 months before movie-delivering. (Note to anyone who has or will at some point carry an actual real life baby: I only feel like this a little.)
But January is definitely crowded, and May may prove a better spot, so there's logic to Summit's move. So May it is. Sorry guys.
The move puts Bloom up against Angels & Demons, Bruno, and the birthday of actor Chazz Palminteri. I can skip Angels & Demons and Bruno, but I'm sorry, I have to go to Chazz's birthday. I already sent back my Facebook reply and everything.
Dec 11 2008 'Duplicity' Poster is a Glitterati Equal Sign
"Outwit"? "Outplay"? Duplicity it starting to sound a lot like Survivor but with spying and more sunglasses.
Duplicity Poster [Jo Blo]
Dec 8 2008 'What Doesn't Kill You' Poster is a Gunman Composed of Actor Heads
When did Ethan Hawke become a meth head? I don't remember watching Gattaca and being afraid the protagonist would run out of his trailer waving a pistol at me. Either he's gotten amazingly good at transforming himself for roles or he's addicted to methamphetamines. So well done/get help (whichever applies).
What Doesn't Kill You Poster [IMPA]
Dec 1 2008 First Look at Depp and Bale as: 'Public Enemies'
Empire has the first look at Johnny Depp and Christian Bale as John Dillinger and lawman Melvin Purvis in Michael Mann's Public Enemies. Based on the images, here's my idea for the trailer narration:
One is a criminal gang leader; the other, an FBI agent. In their apartment they're best friends, but on the street they're about to kill each other. (Boi-yoi-yoi-yoing!) Johnny Depp and Christian Bale are: Public Enemies. (SPLAT!)
How about it, Michael Mann? What it lacks in gravitas it makes up for in spring sound effects.
Oct 30 2008 Last Minute Costume Ideas from 'Sherlock Holmes' Set
The Bad & Ugly has some new shots from the set of Guy Richie's Sherlock Holmes that give a better look at Jude Law as Watson and Robert Downey Jr. as Holmes. Still need a Halloween costume for the weekend? Just get a fedora, tilt it to a jaunty angle, and you're ready to wow the crowds as the world's greatest detective, RDJ style. Next year it will be passé; this year it's cutting edge, so much so that you'll probably have to keep telling people you aren't a hobo.
