Sep 5 2007 Shoot 'Em Up Intercourse/Gunfight Scene
I knew when I saw the trailer (posted above) that Shoot 'Em Up was going to be full of testosterone-driven, ridiculously unbelievable action scenes, and, honestly, I was kind of looking forward to that. But, brother, I had no idea. In this tasteful scene, Clive Owen is having sex with Monica Bellucci when some masked characters, clearly evil, enter. Clive proceeds to exchange gunfire with the men, killing them all, while continuing to bring Monica to orgasm. You'll be amazed with what can happen when believability is thrown out the window in exchange for graphic sex and violence.
Warning: Clip is not safe for work due to Clive Owen having sex with Monica Bellucci while shooting people.
Shoot 'Em Up Sex Clip [IESB]
Aug 23 2007 Natalie Martinez Chooses Death Race
Natalie Martinez will star as the romantic lead opposite Jason Statham in Paul W.S. Anderson's Death Race remake, says Hollywood Reporter. The film, which also stars Joan Allen, Ian McShane and Tyrese Gibson, takes place in a future where prisoners drive in crazy death rallies.
If you'd like to learn more about this film or the casting, turn to page 42. [Hollywood Reporter]
If you'd like to learn more about how Natalie Martinez looks nearly naked, turn to page 102. [Stuff]
Aug 1 2007 Maxim Moving Into Pictures
Maxim's Hometown Hotties campaign goes to hometowns searching for hotties.
Maxim is teaming up with Screen Gems in a three-picture deal that will continue targeting the horny douchebag demographic that currently stocks their bathroom with the magazine. First will come Virginity Rocks, whose title may disagree with many Maxim readers that actually hate virginity, preferring sex regardless of consent. Not to worry, fellas--the plot revolves around "a gorgeous transfer student who clings to her virginity and gets all the promiscuous girls in school to abstain from sex; in response, the popular guys ask the school stud (the popular guy and school stud are different people?!) to try to bed the poster girl and ending her 'virginity rocks' campaign."
Future films will continue the seldom explored "dudes getting laid" theme with Fired Up, the story of two horny guys attending a cheerleading camp (I hope they have sex with cheerleaders!), and Mardis Gras about three horny guys trying to have sex in New Orleans (I hope they have sex with Louisianans!). Like the magazine, all three films will be mildly amusing and only passably filthy enough to masturbate to.
Jun 1 2007 Denise Richards Playing Stripper
Variety reports Denise Richards will star in A Beautiful Life, joining Jesse Garcia, Dana Delany, and Michael Madsen in the indie drama (despite the name, Roberto Benigni is not involved). More importantly, she will be playing an exotic dancer, meaning, like previously with Wild Things, the hopes of seeing her naked will entice thousands of junior high kids to fast forward through most of this movie.
With both Richards and Lindsay Lohan now playing strippers on screen, it's like the line between stripping and acting is becoming blurred. Good news for Talisman, my favorite local exotic dancer, who tells me she's really an actress at heart. You're getting there, darling!
May 18 2007 Lindsay Lohan as Tortured Stripper
The journalists at a little publication known as People nabbed the first look at the poster and stills from I Know Who Killed Me, in which Lindsay Lohan plays a stripper tortured by a serial killer. They're disappointing considering they show no stripping or torture, and she often looks far more like a stripper in her daily life.
Apr 6 2007 Rosario Dawson and Rose McGowan naked for Grindhouse
If there's one way to market a movie, it's to put Rosario Dawson and Rose McGowan on the cover of Rolling Stone wearing nothing but ammo. The movie could be about Stephen Hawking and his struggle to put together a unified field theory and this would still be the best marketing scheme.
