Jul 25 2007 Michael Moore Hates Homos. Er, HMOs
Michael Moore was on Hardball the other day, and, surprise surprise, he wore a hat. He also had some interesting advice for people having trouble with their health insurance providers:
MATTHEWS: If they're right now having a problem with their HMO, and they're not getting treatment for something they think is important, is it best to call their congressperson? What do they do to make sure the kind of thing that happened in your movie happens to them?
MOORE: Actually, what I tell people is, if you're having trouble right now with your insurance company, and they won't pay for something, go ahead and use my name, just say...
MATTHEWS: Say Michael Moore has been talking to me?
MOORE: Say that I'm coming, that you have talked to me personally. You have my permission to do that. In fact, at the end of this week, on my Web site, I'm going have a little like Sicko insurance card you can download, print it out, laminate it, and take it in and say that you're now part of my team, and that we're going to put you on the DVD if you don't help my child. And, so, I give blanket permission to anybody who wants to do that. Carry your Sicko card with you. And, actually, I got this idea because a number of people have already gone ahead and done it.
MATTHEWS: The guy did it in the movie.
MOORE: He did it in the movie.
MATTHEWS: Yes. Without your permission.
MOORE: And he just said, 'Michael Moore is coming'. I never met the guy. The guy just went ahead and said, 'Michael Moore is doing this film.' And, like a week later, the insurance company said, 'OK, we will pay for your daughter's ear operation.'
MATTHEWS: God, there's nothing like a little blackmail. (LAUGHTER)
I offer a similar service to anyone who's in an argument with someone who likes Entourage. They'll be all like, "But dude, it's got hot chicks on it and it's hella tight!" Instead of trying to argue with them, just hand them a card with my picture on it and say "Watch your back, motherf***er." Then let me know where they live and I will take a dump on their lawn.
Jul 20 2007 Ridley Scott to Direct Vampire Movie
Adrian Grenier looks way different in person
If you ask me, vampire movies jumped the shark right around the time Queen of the Damned came out. Apparently, Ridley Scott disagrees and will be directing a screen adaptation of the incomplete manuscript The Passage (seriously? we're optioning movie adaptations of books that haven't even been published yet?).
[The Passage] is a postapocalyptic vampire story set in 2016. The dark tale revolves around a U.S. government project gone awry that turn a group of experimental subjects -- condemned inmates plucked from death row -- into highly infectious vampires. Meanwhile, an orphan named Amy discovers that she has unusual powers, seemingly related to the crisis that quickly overtakes civilized society.
Wow, a main character with a special power destined to save humanity? There's a story that's never been told before. It's sort of like Star Wars meets the Matrix meets Harry Potter meets every science fiction movie ever made. Guess what, A-holes? YOU'RE NOT SPECIAL. I promise.
They should just make an Entourage movie. Now there's an original vampire story. Hollywood, devoid of new ideas and having sold its soul to the devil, lives in a perpetual state of living death and has to suck its own penis for nourishment. You think I'm kidding? Let E try to stand in direct sunlight and let's see what happens.
