Geekologie I Watch Stuff The Superficial

'Baby Mama' is Weekend Box Office Daddy?

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1. Baby Mama - A first place $18.3 million gross proves Tina Fey and Amy Poehler have finally put an end to the boys club of surrogate pregnancy movies. Take that,

2. Harold and Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay - With audiences giving $14.6 million to the sequel this weekend, it would seem some guys actually fulfilled their stoned promise to "get totally baked and see that shit, then get like a case of Sliders on the way home, man."

3. The Forbidden Kingdom - $11.2 million, so apparently I'm the only one who keeps thinking it's an unwatchable NBC mini-series every time I see the name.

4. Forgetting Sarah Marshall - $11 million, making this the highest-grossing Alzheimer's-based romantic-comedy ever.

5. Nim's Island - Still here, with $4.5 million.

'Forbidden Kingdom' Not Forbidden from Winning Weekend Box Office, Because It Did

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The Forbidden Kingdom - After taking in $21.4 million, I'd say this Jet Li/Jackie Chan team-up really jump-kicked the competition, alluding to their martial arts skills.

2. Forgetting Sarah Marshall - $17.7 million, hinting that the close friends and co-workers of the talented Judd Apatow may also have talent of their own?

3. Prom Night - $8.7 million, helped in part by me going with a big group of friends. I mean, I definitely could have gone to Prom Night with a date, but I just thought I'd have more fun without all the pressure. It's not because I couldn't get a girl to go with me. Because I could have.

4. 88 Minutes - $7 million, which is pretty good for something that is, by all accounts, terrible.

Nim's Island - I was thinking, the whole fantasies-becoming-reality-on-an-island would be great as an entirely inappropriate softcore porn, but what would it be called? All I could come up with was Nip's Island. I'm sure there's a better option. Anyway, it made $5.7 million.

Weekend Box Office Results [Box Office Mojo]

'Forbidden Kingdom' Poster Pairs Two Legends

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After what has seemed like a meaningless, empty eternity, one of the most long-awaited, highly-anticipated cinematic pairings in history is finally happening: Jackie Chan is starring alongside Adam Duritz's hair.

And here's the trailer from a few months back.

AICN Exclusive Poster Debut: The Forbidden Kingdom [AICN]

'Forbidden Kingdom' Trailer Sort of Joins China's Biggest Action Stars

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The Forbidden Kingdom has been being touted as this amazing, long-awaited team-up between Jet Li and Jackie Chan. So why, when I see the trailer, am I being completely underwhelmed by some dipshit LaBeouf impostor and his magical, Neverending Story-esque trip to fantasy China? Surely there must have been an easier way to explain these two Chinese action stars working together. Couldn't it just be like an Ocean's Whatever movie, but with Kung Fu stuff and harder to understand? Or Rush Hour, but with Jet Li? Or could we at least get them in the same shot?

If Aliens and Predators or Jason and Freddy can be thrown together with so little regard to logic, why not these two? It can't be the dire need to tell the The Monkey King legend again; if I've already seen four adaptations without even trying, there must be hundreds more in China.

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Jet Li and Jackie Chan to Do Chinese Things

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An angry Lo Pan reeves my racist soul.

As my 7th grade teacher Mrs. Chang taught us, the Chinese are reknowned for their action films as well as their kung fu prowess, mathematics skills, and ineptitude behind the wheel. That's why it's so nice to hear that Jet Li and Jackie Chan, those two Chinese tiger-dragons of action cinema, are teaming up for Forbidden Kingdom.

In this re-telling, an American teenager (Michael Angarano) discovers a staff which transports him to ancient China where he joins in a quest to return the staff to the Monkey King. Jet Li plays the dual role of the Monkey King and Silent Monk while Jackie Chan will play a kung fu master named Lu Yan.

This should be good, because Chris Tucker isn't in it, and any Chinese actor in Hollywood, pretty much the first thing you learn is how to play is a monk or kung fu master. There are only two things that I can think of that would make this movie better:

1. Lo Pan
2. The American teenager should always be addressed as "Young Round-Eye"

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