I Watch Stuff - Probably The Worst Movie Blog You've Ever Seen

Follow the Loop of TV Show References to Other TV Shows

2012-02-06T23:02:25Z

Starting with an SNL episode's reference to 30 Rock, jumping from there to a 30 Rock reference to Community, and continuing on in that fashion, reference to reference, this video from pleatedjeans plots out one possible path to eventually loop back around to an SNL reference, completing the circuit and making all television self-aware and probably hostile. It's a pointless effort for sure, but hey, it only takes a few minutes, and any route that cruises past Fresh Prince of Bel-Air for a cameo from Beetlejuice's Glenn Shadix is a worthwhile trip in my book.

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Honestly, how many séances have you done, Otho?

(via!)

New 'Dredd' Photos Show Exploding Brain, Olivia Thirlby, Huffy Judge Dredd, Naturally

2012-02-06T21:03:45Z

Even placed beside the lovely Olivia Thirlby, still futuristic sourpuss Karl Urban remains perpetually sullen as Mega-City One's judge, executioner, and personified frown emoticon, Judge Dredd. Such noble commitment to helmeted petulance.

As collected by ECBT2000AD (via), here are a few new shots from Peter Travis's upcoming Dredd. Since rumors started about behind the scenes problems from the editing room, little has come out to reassure anyone about the adaptation of the 2000AD comics property, but if nothing else, the below photo of an exploding head does at least seem to confirm a darker take than the 1995 adaptation. As I recall, Rob Schneider's brain was, disappointingly, never so graphically shot out the back of his skull.

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What do you want, Dredd? Ice cream? Do you want to get ice cream? Do you need a little nap? Your Spongebob tape? Come on, you have to speak up or we can't help you.

Posters for: 'Billion Dollar Movie', 'Mirror Mirror', Whatever They're Calling the Newest Adam Sandler Movie

2012-02-06T20:00:57Z

Ranging in quality from garish madness to "this is the new name of Adam Sandler's movie," Tim & Eric's Billion Dollar Movie, Mirror Mirror, and the Adam Sandler film formerly known I Hate You, Dad all have new posters awaiting you below. Have a look and improve your mind with the knowledge of Sandler's latest screen credit.

]]> From Moviefone, here's the Tim & Eric's Billion Dollar Movie's latest poster, which somehow manages to be pretty crazy yet surprisingly subdued for a film that began its marketing campaign with grotesque humanoids screaming "shrim!"

Relativity Media put out these new Mirror Mirror character posters that somehow manage to lower the bar below their TV movie-level trailer. What I mean is, they are "spec-tacular"!!! Because Nathan Lane is arbitrarily holding some glasses, and that's reason enough to invent that catchphrase.

Finally, remember I Hate You, Dad, the movie scheduled to at last realize Adam Sandler as Andy Samberg's father? Well, last week, the title of that film was quietly changed to Donny's Boy, but according to this latest teaser poster, now it's That's My Boy. It remains unclear if that's meant to be read cheerfully or angrily shouted à la Mel Gibson demanding his kidnapped son's safe return.

Will Ferrell Premiered Multiple Beer Commercials This Weekend

2012-02-06T18:29:40Z

Showing a sudden resolve to designate himself the Billy Dee Williams of SNL alumni, Will Ferrell this weekend debuted multiple commercials in which he endorses terrible beer. That's just how Will Ferrell does it these days.

The actor-comedian has previously appeared in Old Milwaukee ads run exclusively in Davenport, Iowa and Terre Haute, Indiana markets, and last night, during the Super Bowl, Ferrell premiered a new spot--this time airing only in North Platte, Nebraska (via). Meanwhile, on Internet, Ferrell also just turned up in a recently-uploaded ad for Escorpion Cerveza, a fake beer (motto: "When you're having more than 12") associated with his upcoming comedy Casa de Mi Padre. I have no idea why he's doing all these beer ads, but the results are worth watching. Milwaukee's Best is really going to have to step it up if they don't want to lose near-undrinkable 30-pack dominance in select midwest markets.
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And in case you missed them, here are Ferrell's prior beer ads:

Harrison Ford Still Might Be in 'Blade Runner' Sequel

2012-02-06T16:33:08Z

Well, may yet see Harrison Ford as an aged replicant clinging to his youth with an earring.

Despite Ridley Scott's claim that his unfortunately planned Blade Runner sequel would be made "not with the past cast, of course," TwitchFilm has since heard otherwise--that the film may in fact be made with the past cast, of course. Their sources say Scott and producers have decided to go the tried-and-true Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull route, bringing Ford back and bundling him in the familiar brown wrapping we know and love, and according to their report, Ford has already entered early talks to join the film in some capacity.

If true, the casting would go not just against Scott's earlier promise but also the words of producer Andrew Kosove, who late last year told the L.A. Times:

"...if you're asking me will this movie have anything to do with Harrison Ford, the answer is no. This is a total reinvention, and in my mind that means doing everything fresh, including casting."

The casting would also pretty much go against Blade Runner's heavily-insinuated notion that Harrison Ford's Deckard was himself a replicant who would never live long enough to star alongside Diane Keaton in Morning Glory, so hopefully Ridley Scott has a good reason for dragging the actor back into this. Like to play a new Blade Runner's quietly delighted grandpa, maybe?

Your Favorite Film/Television Dance Moves as Posters

2012-02-06T15:51:42Z

Learn the steps to such pop culture dances as The Elaine, the Bluths' chicken dances, the Time Warp, whatever that kid was doing in Little Miss Sunshine, and others with these stylish, step-by-step tv/movie dance posters from artist Niege Borges. Study them and you could soon be the nerdiest dancer at any party, unless the guy who always does Dance Dance Revolution moves shows up again.
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Several more on the artist's site; prints available here.

(via!)

Weekend Box Office: 'Chronicle' Narrowly Beats Harry Potter's Ghost Movie

2012-02-06T14:40:06Z

Your weekend box office:

1. Chronicle - $22 million. Found footage once again proves itself the deep frying of filmmaking, capable of turning any cheap product into a profitable, sought-after consumable for the masses. Won't be long now until someone "finds footage" of a Nicholas Sparks romance, and then we can all go to bed.

2. The Woman in Black - $21 million, a second-place but decent opening driven by those eager to yell "You're a wizard, Harry!" at the screen before that gets old.

3. The Grey - $9.5 million, dropping in attendance with perfect correlation to the drop in post-Neeson wolf populations.

4. Big Miracle - $8.5 million. (Note: this is that movie with the commercials for Drew Barrymore, John Krasinski, and whales. I forgot, too.)

5. Underworld Awakening - $5.6 million, coming in well below that forgettable thing with Drew Barrymore, John Krasinski, and whales.

Weekend Box Office Results [Box Office Mojo]

Super Bowl Spots for 'Avengers', 'John Carter', 'Battleship', and More

2012-02-06T05:13:32Z

Sunday night, while the Giants and Patriots competed to determine who is best at doing football, film studios bitterly fought to get audiences interested in whatever combinations of actors, explosions, and expensive CGI they've most recently assigned recognizable titles to. New spots for The Avengers, John Carter, Battleship, The Lorax, and Act of Valor all premiered during the game, giving us all something to consider alongside all the footballing, Madonna medleying, and the question of whether or not Audi really just spent its entire Super Bowl budget on showing off bright headlights and lazy Twilight references. Have a look at the new trailers below.
]]> This Avengers spot premiered as a 30-second spot during the game, but has since appeared online as a full minute trailer with additional new footage. As you can see in the still above, the entire team finally comes together, for at least a few moments, to fight some still-unidentified alien things, and at the end, we're treated to a nice moment of Tony Stark pouring himself a drink and chatting with Norse god/villain Loki about having a Hulk on his side. If that isn't a scene to be expanded into a one-act off-Broadway play, I don't know what is.

As with their Avengers spot, Disney also released a longer version of their John Carter ad as an internet-only supplement. The film's recurrent imagery of vast deserts, lanky alien armies, and elongated, appendaged aircrafts still feels just a littttle too painfully reminiscent of The Phantom Menace, but hey, maybe we just need to chill out, R2.

If the goal of this Battleship commercial was to get confused viewers to ask, "Did someone force Liam Neeson into a Transformers?", it was a roaring success. Though Michael Bay was no doubt furious when he made the startled discovery that someone had stolen his magic pouch of vaguely robotic dins and giant, computer-generated bike chains.

I forget, did anyone in Dr. Seuss's original The Lorax ever die and get resuscitated with electrified bears? Because that happens now.

If the full trailer for Act of Valor looked like a video game, this abbreviated ad, well, still looks like a video game. But this time you just kept mashing "A" to skip all the pointless introductory details about plot and villain. JUST LET ME SHOOT PEOPLE.

Now These Two Will Be in 'Evil Dead' Remake

2012-02-03T22:10:49Z

With heir to the Invisible Touch royalties, Lily Collins, last week dropping out of FilmDistrict's Evil Dead remake, the studio has moved quickly to find a lesser-eyebrowed replacement, and they think they've found on in Suburgatory star Jane Levy. The actress is in talks to join the project as the film's lead, a former drug addict attempting to clean herself up in a desolate cabin but unfortunately running into the forces of the dead, that are evil. As previously mentioned, that character replaces the original's Ash, who was way too male and non-drug-addicted for modern audiences.

Red Riding Hood's Shiloh Fernandez has also joined the Fede Alvarez-directed reboot, and will unavoidably play a character that looks like a rich rapist bragging to his victim that no one will ever believe her. The exact identity of this character has yet to be revealed, but again, it isn't Ash.

Chris Rock Wants Melissa McCarthy for Terrible Relationship with Himself

2012-02-03T21:32:48Z

Whether you do it on the big screen or at a stranger's house party you've crashed, people come looking for you once you've shat in a sink. Ever since Bridesmaids, Melissa McCarthy has been in high demand as a comic co-star, first getting recruited to play a romantic interest of Jon Hamm, then taking a role alongside Jason Bateman, and now Chris Rock is looking to set up a dysfunctional, stereotyped relationship with her in a new film.
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"I'm trying to romance her," Rock said, taking a break last week at a Park City, Utah. The comedian is writing a new untitled script, he said, in which he envisions the "Bridesmaids" breakout playing his wife as the pair indulge in some boisterous dysfunction -- a "Jerry Springer couple," as Rock put it. He said he hopes to persuade the comedic actress to come aboard, and has made some inroads.

McCarthy next appears in Judd Apatow's Knocked Up spin-off, This is Forty--that is, unless you count seeing her on Mike & Molly, which is somehow still airing with her and fat jokes in the lead roles. Melissa McCarthy's agent, you should probably get her off that.

Sharon Stone Hopes You Still See Her as Sexually Thrilling

2012-02-03T19:54:40Z

Though 2006's Basic Instinct 2: Risk Addiction was already sort of pushing her luck in the genre, Sharon Stone is once again returning to betwixt the thighs of erotica and thrillers from whence she came. The 53-year-old actress has signed on to star in Attachment, the latest from writer Christopher Denham and American History X director Tony Kaye. Stone would play a married teacher whose one night of sexual indiscretion with a student has THRILLING consequences when the kid starts dating her daughter and stalking her family. It remains unclear if this production has any connection to Kaye's other recent teacher-focused film, the Adrien Brody-starring Detachment. Also no word on if Sharon Stone will show enough naked to make it worth continuing the tradition of sneaking out of bed to tape this thing off scrambled Showtime.

'Captain America' Much Better Movie with Graphic Lego Violence

2012-02-03T19:25:07Z

As Arnold Schwarzenegger would say, "[Captain America] continuously used him as a human shield, and then [he] threw him down." And that's only a a taste of the raw, plastic gruesomeness in this jaw-dropping stop-motion Captain America. It may be made of interlocked plastic bits and clay, but it's also pretty Real.
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It retrospect, Chris Evans must feel like a bit of a dandy for not shooting any Nazis to the point that they're just a pile of anti-semitic mush. Maybe in the sequel.

(Thanks to Mike P., who forgot to include the link in his tip, but that's fine; thanks to context clues, I eventually found his reference here, and it all worked out.)

Phew! 'Short Circuit' Remake Being Written by Disney Writing Program Graduate

2012-02-03T18:27:39Z

Dimension Films' Short Circuit remake now has a writer to instruct Alvin and the Chipmunks director Tim Hill how exactly to make the CGI robot dance. Deadline reports the thankless task of re-writing the tale of an escaped government robot-turned-Ally Sheedy lover has been handed to Matt Lieberman, an assured graduate of the "Disney writers program" who has thus far used his broad, family-oriented training only in writing the straight-to-video Doctor Dolittle spin-off Tail to the Chief. Disappointingly, despite the loud, insistent clamor for more on this exciting new project, "details of the new version are being kept secret." How long must we wait to find out Katy Perry will be in this, and will sing a dance-oriented duet of Mr. Roboto with Justin Timberlake's slightly-mechanized voice?

Spike Jonze Casting Adorable Computer Voice for Joaquin Phoenix To Love

2012-02-03T17:26:04Z

Amy Adams, Carey Mulligan, and Samantha Morton are all reportedly competing for the Siri/Majel Barrett-like role of a pleasant, female computer voice in a developing Spike Jonze project. Different than the upcoming Spike Jonze-directed, Charlie Kaufman-scripted satire about world leaders, this just-revealed film was written by Jonze himself, and already has Joaquin Phoenix set to star. He'll be playing a man--apparently the saddest, most forever alone man alive--who falls in love with the aforementioned disembodied female computer voice--a Lars and the Real Girl for the iPhone 4S age. Already this makes me feel better about things I've done to the time & temperature voice.

David Lynch Coffee Ad Plays Pretty Much as Bizarrely Dread-Inducing as You'd Guess

2012-02-03T16:25:26Z

If there's one thing David Lynch likes in his mouth more than still-warm panties, it's still-warm coffee. For about a year, the director has been selling his own line of coffee, and just last month he wrote a piece for Huffington Post detailing his long-standing obsession over the drink. Now, there's a Lynch-directed commercial for his David Lynch Signature Cup Organic coffee, and, predictably, it eschews the heartfelt reunions and catchy jingles that dominate the coffee advertising landscape. After all, who's to say you can't sell a cup of joe with morose, borderline self-parody brewed in disquieting psychosexual nightmares? Not Dave Lynch, that's for sure:
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Yes, David Lynch, that is exactly what I want to wake up to every morning. Folgers is going to kick themselves for not thinking of this campaign first.

(via!)