April 17, 2006
The Omen International Trailer
The international trailer for The Omen remake has hit the Internet. Though half of it is stock footage, there's a lot of neat stuff, including rabid apes, an old pope spilling wine, a baby mutant skeleton, Julie Stiles in a tub of blood, and the deformed freak above. After watching, I was reminded why I don't have kids. Who's to say I wouldn't have the anti-christ, here to fulfill a prophecy to end the world? With my genes, I'd say there's a pretty good chance I would. Or worse yet, what if he were retarded?
Previous Entries
First Look at Bond Villain Le Chiffre
A Danish newspaper has printed the first picture of the villain of the new Bond film, Le Chiffre. Wisely, the filmmakers have gone with the deadly look of nerdy haircut meets steak knife accident. Isn't the whole villain with a facial scar thing kind of played out at this point? If they want to be both original and scary, they should do something new with his face, like hang a testicle off a cheek. That way, when he's interrogating Bond, he can say, "Surrender, Mr. Bond, or I'll make you touch my facial testicle, which is exactly what it sounds like," to which Bond would reply, "I'd been wondering what was in that miniature velvet sack on your cheek."
Meg Concept Art
Straddling the line between awesome and idiotic, concept art has been released for Meg, a movie about the hunt for an 80-foot, 100,000 pound Megalon shark. Strangely, I have a ballpoint pen version of the same concept in a junior high notebook, except I also had the vision to place a ninja clan on the shark's back, and instead of a surfer, it's going after my parents.
I don't so much wonder what this scene will be in the movie, as much as why this scene isn't in every movie. I can't think of a single film this scene wouldn't add something to, even if that "something" was just an enormous shark eating a surfer. Isn't that enough?
New Shots from Superman Returns
Warner Brothers has released some new images from the hotly anticipated Superman Returns. I've heard that all art is either vaginal or phallic, and there's never been a better example than here. The deep, vertical hole Luthor approaches through is clearly vaginal, reminiscent of the anatomy of the female, while the shot of Brandon Routh as Clark Kent is obviously phallic, since he looks like kind of a dick running around in a vest like that.
Large versions and one more after the jump.
New Mission: Impossible III Art
The boys down at the studio have released the horizontal art for Mission: Impossible III. Since it's long, you can print it out and finally make that Tom Cruise belt you've been asking for. The one where he's sliding so hard that sparks are shooting out. See Cruise looking like a confused running robot on the bus shelter art under the cut. Or just wait to see it at the bus shelter. There's no shame in that.
District B13 Trailer
The French action flick District B13 is coming on June 2, so until then, watch this trailer for it. This movie is a good example of how America's policies differ from the French. To them, it's apparently completely appropriate to send two police officers in to stop a large gang that's acquired a nuclear warhead, while to us that's ridiculous. You only need one cop: Steven Segal. Have you heard the saying, too many cooks spoils the stew? The same goes for jumpkicks. Sure, Segal may dress like a matador, but when you're talking about a gang with nuclear weapons, there's only one guy to turn to. And while I won't say the movie needs Steven Segal to work, I will say that when the trailer ended, I felt a "ponytail emptiness" that I'd never experienced before.
