March 24, 2006

United 93 Trailer

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The trailer for United 93 is now available, providing the first real look at the courageous 9/11 story writer/director Paul Greengrass has created. I was all set to hate this trailer just for it's subject matter alone (I only show my patriotism through bumper stickers and racial prejudice), but then I saw the above shot of the pilots, their hands romantically close as they push the throttle, and I was sold. I had this movie all wrong. This isn't an exploitive, hokey, thriller. This is a true romance. This will do for 9/11 what Titanic did for the Titanic disaster: help us dismiss the tragic elements and replace them with sex.

When I saw that touching moment in this trailer, I'll be honest, I shed a single tear. As it ran down my face, I looked into one of my (many) bedside mirrors. The tear, in its salty wetness, had written, "Let's Roll" across my cheek. And my clothes...they had become American flags! Suddenly, the room was full of majestic bald eagles, their calls sounding suspiciously like our National Anthem! And, somehow, I had finished an entire bottle of cold medicine.

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Previous Entries

The Notorious Bettie Page Notorious Clip

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Ain't It Cool News has an exciting clip from The Notorious Bettie Page, showing some of the actresses from the movie re-enacting a Bettie Page bondage film. It doesn't really provide any feeling for what the movie is like, but it does feature women in underwear tying each other up and spanking. So don't complain, or I'll point out your wandering gaze at the urinals. That's right, I caught you, pervert.

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Art School Confidential Trailer #2

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The first trailer for Art School Confidential didn't look that interesting to me, but with the second, more of the plot of director Terry Zwigoff's dark comedy is revealed, and it's starting to look pretty decent. Seeing the young cast facing the trials and tribulations of college started to remind me of my glory days back in art school, when all I did was paint and get laid. Or maybe it reminded me more of my four days living in a Shell Station bathroom, eating thrown-away Hostess cakes and showering in the sink. Whichever actually happened.

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Vince Vaughn Fighting George Clooney For Magnum P.I.?

magnum-pi-vaughn.jpgThe latest casting rumor regarding the feature adaptation of the popular 80's television series, Magnum P.I., is that Vince Vaughn is now contending with George Clooney for the lead:

The scriptwriter is Rawson Marshall Thurber, who wrote Dodgeball, and there are several other guys on the Magnum movie with connections to Vince. George is still favourite but, as time goes by, Vince's name will be thrown up more and more.

When will these Hollywood big-wigs realize that role of Thomas Magnum isn't the kind you can cast with good looks, star power, or comedic timing. This decision needs to be based solely on a mustache. You find the right mustache and the rest will take care of itself. The same goes for NASCAR drivers and child molesters.

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Snakes on a Plane Has a Logo

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For whatever reason, the makers of Snakes on a Plane have deemed it necessary for the film to have a logo, and Entertainment Weekly's got the scoop. It basically looks like if the American Medical Association logo were designed to be airbrushed on the hood of a Camaro. It's that awesome. And it's just in time, too; I have a tattoo appointment at 4:30.

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Mission: Impossible III Poster

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The new poster for Mission: Impossible III has been released, finally completing the trilogy of Tom Cruise looking intense in profile. I thought since he's been getting such negative press lately, they might shy away from showing him too prominently, but there he is, looking like a guerilla Time Life operator. If you look closely, you can see his thumb is resting on a small, red button. This is a rare, private look at Cruise's "crazy button."

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