January 30, 2006
Thursday the 12th
I've always said, "Sure, Jason Voorhees is great at a-killin', but what was he like before he started hacking people apart?" New Line has finally responded with the news of a Friday the 13th prequel in the works, to be released on Friday, October 13th, the very day/date combination the film is based on! Though details are scant, I'm hoping this new film will finally uncover Jason's teenage, awkward stage, when the mask was just to cover acne and a bashful insecurity towards the fairer sex. I'm also hoping it reveals that Jason was beaten up by girls and refused to shower in gym, because then maybe they'll cast me as Jason.
Previous Entries
Omen 666 Teaser Shows Devil Dresses Sharply
So Fox has released a teaser trailer for The Omen 666. In it, we slowly approach the Devil incarnate child Damien as he slowly drifts back-and-forth on a swing. Just as we get close to him, he quickly turns towards the camera, staring with all the evil inside him.
Except, he really doesn't seem that evil. I mean, sure, he seems a little pretentious in his smart little red ensemble, but I don't know if it's that evil. Couldn't they make his eyes glow red, or have him spit some flames, have his lower half turn into a serpent beast, or something like that? Maybe that's too blatant for some, but don't we need some kind of definitive characteristic to firmly distinguish between Satan himself and just some chubby shit of a kid?
Gollum Gets Prestige
Andy Serkis, who gained a following playing Gollum in Lord of the Rings, both Kong and Lumpy in King Kong, and having the hair of Brian Setzer, has been cast as an assistant to David Bowie in Christopher Nolan's new film The Prestige. In the film, Hugh Jackman and Christian Bale star as rival magicians battling each other for trade secrets. Here's a tip if you're going to be an assistant to David Bowie: know now that it will likely involve wearing spandex and at least a few awkward conversations about androgyny.
Napoleon Dynamite To Sumo Wrestle
The writers of Wedding Crashers, Steve Faber and Bob Fisher, have been commissioned by Fox to write a script based on Josha Davis's GQ article about being a 134-pound man competing in the U.S. Sumo Open. John Heder of Napoleon Dynamite fame is already being tapped to play the lead. Let's hope these comedy writers are able to resist making this too much of a slapstick, and really get to the deep emotional drama of a skinny white guy wrestling a nearly-naked 500 pound man.
My only question: When will Hot Topic begin carrying "Vote for Sumo" shirts?
Kidman and Leigh Following Squid
Nicole Kidman and Jennifer Jason Leigh are set to star in Noah Baumbach's untitled follow-up to The Squid and the Whale:
Although details are being kept under wraps, the film will be another multigenerational story that takes place over a weekend and follows a mom and her son who visit the mom's sister. Kidman and Leigh are in talks to play the sisters
With Baumbach at the helm, this film sounds like one to keep an eye on. But more importantly: how did he know about my dreams where Nicole Kidman and Jennifer Jason Leigh are sisters? And if he does know about those dreams, can he explain why Patrick Duffy is also in them? His presence is bringing up too many questions I can't answer.
Robin Williams Plays Teddy
Does anyone think Robin Williams is still funny? Apparently, the creators of Night at the Museum do, because he's been cast in the Ben Stiller comedy. The film, which also stars Carla Gugino, Kim Raver, Mickey Rooney, and Dick Van Dyke, tells the story of a bumbling security guard that unlocks a curse in a museum, making the displays come to life. Williams will play Theodore Roosevelt, who is awakened from one of the museum's exhibits.
Hollywood's nailed the casting of a film yet again. While Roosevelt was the first American to win a Nobel Prize, famous for the quote, "Speak softly and carry a big stick," and a key figure in creating the Panama Canal, Williams often jumps on chairs spouting a chain of impressions, and was a key figure in creating Mrs. Doubtfire and Bicentennial Man. The two couldn't be better matched.
