December 15, 2005
Poseidon Trailer
I'm going to tell you right now why Poseidon is going to suck monkey balls and make zero money at the box office: because nobody cares about it and nobody wants to see it. I'm sure the idea of remaking The Poseidon Adventure with a big budget and lots of special effects sounded like a good idea in the exec meeting, but honestly nobody cares about these kinds of movies anymore. They already gave us an amusingly bad made-for-TV remake on NBC and unless this one is able to physically spit money at us as we watch I don't see it being much better. Ooh a big wave. Ooh, stuff falling over. Ooh, semi-famous people climbing around an upside down ship. Maybe Hollywood should just give up and let Charlie Kaufman write all of their scripts.
Previous Entries
The DaVinci Code Trailer
I'm going to go ahead and admit I've never read the book so maybe I've got a skewed perspective, but the new trailer for The DaVinci Code looks absolutely boring. I understand that Ron Howard and Tom Hanks are involved so it'll be difficult for it to suck, but I have almost zero interest in watching it after seeing this trailer. But maybe that's because it's been put through the Hollywood machine and all they could churn out was a three minute thriller about a mystery that will "change mankind forever" as opposed to actually suggesting what the story is about or why it'll blow my socks off. I'm really hoping this will turn out like Gattaca where the movie is 10 million times better than the trailer.
Lady in the Water poster
The new Lady in the Water poster has been released, and it looks absolutely splendid. Considering M. Night Shyamalan seems incapable of making a bad movie, it's a pretty safe bet to say I'm looking forward to this. I personally don't like to ruin movies for myself by reading all about them, so I don't really know what the movie is about. But judging from the trailer and the poster and the fact that M. Night Shyamalan makes good movies, it probably wouldn't be a bad idea to wander in on this one. Though if you're desperate for a synopsis I copy/pasted the one provided by IMDB. I didn't actually read it so I might have accidentally gotten the one off Braveheart, but it's all good.
Synopsis: In "Lady in the Water," a story originally conceived by Shyamalan for his children, a modest building manager named Cleveland Heep (Paul Giamatti) rescues a mysterious young woman (Bryce Dallas Howard) from danger and discovers she is actually a narf, a character from a bedtime story who is trying to make the treacherous journey from our world back to hers. Cleveland and his fellow tenants start to realize that they are also characters in this bedtime story. As Cleveland falls deeper and deeper in love with the woman, he works together with the tenants to protect his new fragile friend from the deadly creatures that reside in this fable and are determined to prevent her from returning home.
Blade TV Show Pictures
Comics Continuum has gotten the first few pics of the upcoming "Blade" TV series. The series started shooting on November 14th in Vancouver and they have about one more week left of shooting there. The series will air in June on Spike TV, though it looks pretty lame without Wesley Snipes. Maybe I'll be pleasantly surprised and it'll be totally badass. More pics after the jump.
The Showbiz Show gets renewed
For reasons I'll never understand, Comedy Central has renewed The Showbiz Show with David Spade. Maybe they forgot that being funny was a requirement for being a comedy show. Or maybe they just enjoy renewing pieces of shit. Either way, this is a terrible decision on Comedy Central's part. Either they really dropped the ball, or there are enough people watching that crap that they felt it warranted a second season. And I'm really hoping that's not the case, because I have more faith in humanity than that.
Harold and Kumar sequel?
Kal Penn, the Kumar of Harold and Kumar go to White Castle told MTV that they're currently in discussions of doing a Harold and Kumar sequel. Most people out there probably think this is a stupid idea, but I actually liked Harold and Kumar go to White Castle. It dealt with racism in a fresh way, and it was pretty damn funny. The car scene where Harold and Kumar are talking about their driver's huge boil? Comic gold, my friends.
