October 11, 2005
Genndy Tartakovsky set to make some awesome
Genndy Tartakovsky, the guy behind Star Wars: Clone Wars and Samurai Jack has signed up with Orphange Animation Studios to put together five feature films produced in the $50 million-$75 million range.
Although best known as a visual effects boutique, the Orphanage plans to open a completely new animation facility with a separate production pipeline. Its plan is to produce its first feature animated film by late 2007 or early '08, though that date is subject to Tartakovsky and the Orphanage finding a studio partner to release the film.
When the man behind the Star Wars: Clone Wars micro series is given $50 million to put together an actual movie, you can be pretty damn sure it'll be awesome. And not run of the mill awesome, but so awesome your eyeballs will literally catch fire. I don't know how, but it's going to happen. Trust me. I'm an expert when it comes to eyeballs catching on fire.
October 10, 2005
Weekend Box Office
1. Wallace & Gromit: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit - $16.1 million
I'm a fan of the films, but the thought of a full length feature film seems tedious. Plus British humor doesn't really sit right with me anymore.
2. Flightplan - $10.8 million
Highly regarded as a terrible movie, this crazy sunuvatich movie is still making oodles of money. If anybody has an explanation, feel free to let me know. No wait, scratch that. I don't care.
3. In Her Shoes - $10 million
Cameron Diaz in a bikini always means good business. It's amazing how many people out there enjoy seeing skinny pig-faces in their bikinis.
4. Two for the Money - $8.4 million
Three for the plants, baby. Three for the plants.
5. The Gospel - $8 million
What the fuck is this? Not only have I heard nothing about it, I still don't even know what the fuck it is. The fact that this could do better than Serenity and A History of Violence and I have no clue what it is just goes to show you how qualified I really am for this job.
Hollywood conducts most important research ever
Research by Online Testing eXchange explained that the recent slump at box offices was because less people were watching movies. Well that was money well spent, huh?
Males under 25 years-old, a core movie audience, saw fewer films this past summer but watched more DVDs, played more video games and surfed the Web more often than previously, according to a study released on Monday. This past summer, ticket revenues fell to $3.62 billion, their lowest level since 2001 and the estimated number of tickets sold -- 541 million -- was the lowest level since 1997, according to box office tracker Exhibitor Relations.
Yes, good job. Brilliant research. These folks spent oodles of money to figure out that the slump in movie sales was because people were watching less movies. I'll save these guys $50k and just go ahead and tell them that TV viewership also falls when people don't watch TV. Coincidence? I think maybe.
The Flash released on DVD
Warner Bros Home Video will release the entire Flash series on January 10, 2006. The 6 disc set will include all 22 episodes of the series, including the 90 minute pilot movie that kicked it all off. The suggested retail price is $59.98. Unfortunately there doesn't appear to be any extras on the set. And even more unfortunately, still no explanation as to what it is The Flash's costume is made out of. It looks like raw meat to me.
The Apprentice gets old
If you missed last week's Apprentice, the teams put together a tech expo for a bunch of old people. What's hilarious is that the old white dude that works for Donald Trump seemed to be as interested in the snacks and stuff as all the other old people. Here he is, a guy that makes a gazillion dollars a day who has to occasionally give Donald Trump a blowjob, and once you put a plate of crackers in front of him he reverts back to the 90-year old guy that he is. I bet he wears a diaper too. That's funny.
A History of Violence Review
I was walking through Barnes & Nobles checking out the graphic novels section like I always do when I saw "A History of Violence" and had my mind blown. I can't be the only person who didn't know that the movie was based on a comic book, because very few people read comic books and even fewer of those few people read comic books called "A History of Violence." I don't know what the point of this was, but A History of Violence is a good movie. Not nearly as historical as you'd hope it would be, but the violence sure was there. A damn shame about the history thing, though. I find nothing improves psychological dramas more than historical facts and numbers. Anyways, Viggo Mortensen has a weird scar on his lip that I didn't notice during LOTR so that's always fun. Best review ever? Best review ever.
