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That Movie with Lindsay Lohan and a Porn Star Is Evidently Not Very Good

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If you were looking forward to seeing Lindsay Lohan naked in The Canyons, I'm sorry, but you're just going to have to continue with your current go-to naked Lindsay Lohan sources, because no one is going to show this movie. At least not in a festival, where it would have to be recognized as competition against other, actual films.

After already being rejected by Sundance--whose standards continue to remain above a drunk person flipping around for some tits or a porn star or something at 3 AM--Paul Schrader's nudity-filled The Canyons has now been rejected by SXSW as well, THR reports. The film, which stars Lohan and porn penis James Deen, is said to suffer from "quality issues"--unsurprising considering that the two trailers released thus far look reasonable only alongside banana peels, apple cores, and discarded fish skeletons with the head and tail still intact.

"It's got an ugliness and a deadness to it," an SXSW insider said, ostensibly describing only the film, not anyone who takes their clothes off in it in a last-ditch grab for dwindling fame. But it looks like we may have to wait a while to find out ourselves. Probably until some drunk night, around 3 AM, when seeing some ugly, dead tits doesn't sound all that bad.

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