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'Battleship' Trailer: 'Transformers' Meets Boats

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Though Taylor Kitsch has kept himself busy fighting CGI aliens abroad, he has not forgotten his responsibility to defend our own world from CGI alien forces as well. In this trailer for Battleship--ostensibly based on the parlor game of the same name, though no it isn't--Kitsch and his crew of pop singers and True Blood stars protect Earth's own waters from a deadly threat unseen since a couple months ago: all the loudest, most crudely-defined shit from Transformers: Dark of the Moon! That's right; the same vaguely robotic dins, giant bike chains, and general exploding shit that haunted poor Shia LaBeouf last summer have returned to wreak havoc on an extremely specific plot of water. Michael Bay is going to be so pissed when he realizes he must have left his USB stick in the editing suite...

Rest in peace, apparently, Liam Neeson.

  • March 13, 2012
    Having been given a few months to add more CGI shit since the last trailer, Universal and Hasbro have for us a new Battleship preview that has so much more CGI shit. Now we get a better look at these aliens and their ripped-from-a-first-person-shooter armor. We see the inner-wo... / Continue →
  • April 18, 2012
    Battleship promos have so far focused mostly on showing off how many Transformers are in the film (there are several!), so here's a clip to highlight the film's personal, human side that will later be facing the CGI, alien side. In the scene, the pleasingly-shaped Brooklyn Dec... / Continue →
  • April 20, 2012
    As little faith as I have in Battleship, I really don't want to ruin it for anyone any more than I want to ruin a drinking buddy's birthday wish. So if you do not want to spoil what the aliens look like before you see them fight boats, please do not click ahead to the following... / Continue →
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