December 11, 2011 - December 17, 2011 Archives
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Remember when it was rumored Lars von Trier was going to remake Taxi Driver? Well, that ended up not happening, but here's the next strangest thing: an abridged Taxi Driver directed by and starring Michel Gondry as the new Travis Bickle, sociopathic on whimsy and violent with c... / Continue →
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Flanders is Walter White, Bart is Jesse, Lionel Hutz is Saul Goodman, and hillbillies Cletus and Brandine are the meth heads with the stolen ATM machine in Breaking Bart, a mash-up that works better than it should, transposing Breaking Bad dialogue over scenes from The Simpsons... / Continue →
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Lest you think he only does patently ridiculous action bullshit within groups of eight or more hulking men, Sylvester Stallone will precede next summer's Expendables 2 with the evocatively-titled Bullet to the Head, a film that pars down Stallone's team to just one other dude. ... / Continue →
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Correcting the usual problems of "floating head" movie posters, this new one-sheet for The Hunger Games affixes the floating heads to banners, and copy-pastes a bunch of them in a row. Progress! Or probably not. Either way, this is definitely a new Hunger Games poster. Add it t... / Continue →
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In the upcoming Lifetime Original Movie Untouchable, Rob Lowe plays the notorious Drew Peterson, the real-life husband that--like pretty much every other real-life husband in a Lifetime Original Movie--stands accused of murdering a couple of his wives. I would never ask that yo... / Continue →
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While the first Expendables 2 poster was quick to show off all of its aging, muscled wares, the film's latest one-sheet keeps it restrained--or at least comparatively restrained for a movie about dudes constantly shooting/stabbing shit. Here we have only Sylvester Stallone's ve... / Continue →
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You'll never hear anyone talk about ridiculous magic beans in such hushed, solemn tones as in Bryan Singer's Jack the Giant Killer. "These are holy relics," claims a man with a bowl cut, referring to a handful of just beans. "They [the beans] have the power to change the world ... / Continue →
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- When viewed in person, this new Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter poster switches between the image of the 16th President in the Oval Office and a crazy, drunk man alone in the woods and dressed like Lincoln for reasons he can't clearly recall. - Brian de Palma's remake of Cri... / Continue →
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Early word regarding Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance is that it's a pretty terrible film, but you'd never know it from how cheerfully this new trailer for the film revels in being utterly braindead. "ROAD KILL," deadpans Nicolas Cage after using his giant, magic, fiery chain t... / Continue →
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With this month treating us to a duo of Steven Spielberg films--The Adventures of Tintin and Check Out This Great Horse: The Movie--Fandor has used this rare time of dense Spielbergian emotional manipulation as an excuse to put together a video essay on what's being called "The... / Continue →
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The official website for The Amazing Spider-Man is online, and it promises Marc Webb's reboot will be "the first in a series of movies that tells a different side of the Peter Parker story"--the side upon which Spider-Man's shoes are a lot flashier. The site also has a whole ba... / Continue →
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Your new releases: Mission: Impossible - Ghost Protocol Director: Brad Bird Starring: Tom Cruise, Jeremy Renner, Paula Patton, Simon Pegg Good if you want to see: Tom Cruise running, climbing, occasionally dangling. Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows Director: Guy Ritchie Sta... / Continue →
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The Hollywood Foreign Press Association today announced their nominees for all the best things that have appeared in cinemas and televisions over the last year. See the complete list of honorees below, and start pondering how host Ricky Gervais will ever come up with enough Geo... / Continue →
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Don't cry, Sly. Look at all the friends you have! / Continue →
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- The FCC has at last done something reasonable in passing the Commercial Advertisement Loudness Mitigation Act (CALM), a mandate that will require that television commercials maintain the same average volume as the shows they accompany. The auditory reign of Chili's baby back ... / Continue →
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David Cross has never hid the fact that he, like probably everyone else involved, only does Alvin and the Chipmunks films for the crazy money 20th Century Fox pays people to pretend to interact with CGI animals. In a 2008 open letter, Cross went on the defensive to point-by-poi... / Continue →
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Tyler Perry's Tyler Perry, Businessman thought his life was perfect. Ivy League education, well-paying job, beautiful wife willing to make him egg whites and oatmeal every morning... But one day, while scrounging for toilet paper in a janitorial closet, everything changed. It w... / Continue →
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Eschewing the traditional model for advertising Mission: Impossible films--seeing how much of a poster you can fill with Tom Cruise's solemn face--this last-minute one-sheet for the latest in the M:I franchise instead takes an always-popular minimalist, Saul Bass-inspired form.... / Continue →
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Finally giving us a full-costume look at his portrayal of the 16th President, Daniel Day-Lewis was spotted with director Steven Spielberg and a sorrowful child on the Richmond, VA set of Lincoln last Thursday. Thankfully, Spielberg appears to have sprung for the higher end Bear... / Continue →
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Alright, maybe that's being harsh. Maybe this isn't Sacha Baron Cohen's equivalent of Mike Myers' abysmal 2008 comedy The Love Guru. But it is Sacha Baron Cohen's movie in which he puts on a beard and wacky accent, enlists the aid of Ben Kingsley, pleasures a hot actress playin... / Continue →
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Well, apparently a solid foundation of fire piss was still not enough to rise Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance above its terrible predecessor. The Neveldine and Taylor film recently premiered at Aint It Cool News's Buttnumbathon, and reviewers in attendance have since spewed th... / Continue →
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With Bourne series writer Tony Gilroy still continuing the franchise without the seemingly-necessary involvement of Jason Bourne, Matt Damon is now opening up about what a shit head Gilroy was about writing the third film, The Bourne Ultimatum. On his press rounds for promoting... / Continue →
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- Director Alex Proyas's plans for an aerial warfare-based adaptation of Paradise Lost, which was to star Bradley Cooper as People Magazine's 2011 Sexiest Lucifer, has reportedly been put on hold due to the budget rising beyond the $120 million mark. What, Legendary Pictures, y... / Continue →
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Combining Tom Cruise and a jukebox musical must have seemed like a good idea at some level. Both come with an inherent loud exuberance and broad familiarity that has made My Moms nationwide take pause and nod approvingly when either appears on a morning show. Unfortunately, tho... / Continue →
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There's still another year until Baz Luhrmann's The Great Gatsby reaches theaters, but a couple official photos have already found their way onto the internet, offering a peek at how F. Scott Fitzgerald's words will appear as seen through the 3D camera lenses they were always m... / Continue →
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Come movie night, it's always the same argument: she wants to watch a romance movie, he wants to watch movie about a violent global pandemic that gradually strips populations of their senses. What are a very specific sociopath and his girlfriend to do!? At last, a solution: The... / Continue →
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A new poster for The Amazing Spider-Man is here, this one boldly claiming the film will provide "the untold story" of the superhero whose story was certainly never told in a Tobey Maguire film that grossed $821 million worldwide. Have a look.... / Continue →
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As the trailer for G.I. Joe: Retaliation opens, already the eponymous team is being betrayed. Like a mom angry that she keeps stepping on your little plastic men, the U.S. President (or, more likely, Arnold Vosloo's evil Disguise Man) has ordered the elimination of all G.I. Joe... / Continue →
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As much as he loves continually producing shittier versions of things you once loved, George Lucas is reportedly struggling with his efforts to write another Indiana Jones. With Steven Spielberg throwing him under the bus about how stupid Kingdom of the Crystal Skull's crystal ... / Continue →
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Just in case the last trailer for The Flowers of War wasn't enough smothering melodrama for you, here's a new trailer that lays some children's choir-sung "Gloria in Excelsis" down for good measure, jusssst to make sure you're fully aware that genocide is quite a serious, drama... / Continue →
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Welp, the 2011 Black List is here. Unrelated to the blacklist that informs store managers which Target cafeterias I'm still allowed to go in, this one is meant as a measure of the popularity of unproduced screenplays making the rounds on the desks of Hollywood film executives t... / Continue →
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2004's Shaun of the Dead marked not just the arrival of the Spaced team of Edgar Wright, Simon Pegg, and Nick Frost as a force in the feature film business; it also marked the beginning of group's Three Flavours Cornetto Trilogy--also called the Blood and Ice Cream Trilogy--a t... / Continue →
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Your lackluster weekend box office: 1. New Year's Eve - $13.7 million, debuting to only a quarter of Valentine's Day's $56.3 million opening weekend. Good news for those of us wishing an end to Garry Marshall's holiday ensembles; bad news for Hector Elizondo and his dreams of ... / Continue →
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Men in Black 3's production was reportedly plagued by long shooting delays, repeated script problems, and the difficulties of parking Will Smith's wacky, novelty-sized trailer, but you won't see any of those issues making it to the screen in the sequel's first trailer. Rather, ... / Continue →
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Continuing fellow superhero Ben Affleck: Daredevil's tradition of letting giant bald bullies throw his mask in a puddle, Batman loses his cowl to Tom Hardy's Bane in this newest poster for The Dark Knight Rises. This shit is going to get so wet 'n' wild, guys.... / Continue →

