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Arnold Schwarzenegger Doesn't Understand Audio Commentaries, Might Be Mentally Ill

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Asked to record an audio commentary as a bonus feature for a DVD release of Total Recall, star and former state official Arnold Schwarzenegger apparently interpreted this request as a solicitation for him to watch the film and simply describe what is happening on screen and whether or not he liked it. Because of this, his commentary makes it sound like he has severe brain damage, and it is a wonder to hear--particularly if you're blind, and always hoped someone would, beat by beat, describe what's happening in Total Recall. Here, let Arnold Schwarzenegger do that for you:

I always thought Arnold's pumping and cumming rant should have been the foundation of any political ad campaign run against him. As it turns out, this would have been way better.

(Thanks, M.F., and thanks to the Internet Hero who assembled this.)

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