Do the various televised incarnations of Stargate, collectively, still have more dignity than you're looking for in a film-to-television sci-fi series? Well, perhaps we can find something shitty enough for you in this new crop of offerings from FreemantleMedia Enterprises and SyFy Channel.
As revealed at MIPCOM 2011 in Cannes today, Freemantle has acquired the rights to the Universal Soldier franchise, and is working to develop it into a television series in which we can follow along with the re-animated Vietnam vets on a weekly basis, and speculate around the water cooler what we think will happen now that the Van Damme character dramatically lost his little eyepiece or whatever. While this development doesn't really make sense, it sort of makes sense considering the unexpected revival the Universal Soldier series has seen in recent years. In 2009, Van Damme and Lundgren reunited for Universal Soldier: Regeneration, and there are plans for them to soon be resurrected again in a 3-D adventure that will send Luc Deveraux's kicks right into the audience, as they were always intended to be kicked. Damian Kindler will lead the new series' writing staff, bringing with him the experiences of multiple Stargate shows and a pretty clear career path.
Meanwhile, the paragon of original series known as SyFy is developing a television adaptation of last spring's Matt Damon-starring thriller, The Adjustment Bureau. In that film, it was revealed that the fate of all man was dictated by "Chairman" and forcibly carried out by a team of guys in fedoras. Amidst the reveal that all human free-will is an illusion, Matt Damon has a crush on Emily Blunt, and he gets pouty when the Adjustment Bureau guys tell him he isn't allowed to date her. It's still unclear if the series would focus on one such star-crossed protagonist or if, in the universal hope of finding the next Mad Men, we'll focus on the well-dressed adjusters in their workplace as they maybe come to terms with having adjusted things wrong because of one too many scotches on the rocks. Or, considering it's a SyFy production, maybe we'll probably just concentrate on the one Adjustment Bureau employee who is a giant prehistoric shark. Regardless, someone better get John Rhys-Davies fitted for his hat.