These intolerable college kids just wanted a break from their studies! They just wanted to spend some time on a lake, taking their shirts off and engaging in forgettable dialogues that a screenwriter thought sounded just like how real people talk! They couldn't know there would be a 3-D shark in the water! Nor that the fish would sometimes linger behind them for a while before attacking, watching their nubile bodies bounce as if in slow motion, carefully assigning each young woman a mental score before physically tearing her apart with his powerful shark jaws. It turns out that's what happened, though (possibly):
How much better would this be if the shark had the voice of JB Smoove?
Michael Bay is sure going to have a big CGI write-off on his tax return this year. After charitably donating numerous chain-like chrome things, vaguely robotic dins, and destroyed skyscrapers to Battleship, it seems he may have saved his largest philanthropical gift yet for The... / Continue →
You may think replacing the Bourne series' title hero with Jeremy Renner's whoever-the-fuck was just a reactionary afterthought to the departure of franchise star Matt Damon, but you could not be more wrong, insists this first trailer for The Bourne Legacy. "THERE WAS NEVER JUS... / Continue →
This sure looks like a Spider-Man movie! A new trailer for Marc Webb's The Amazing Spider-Man, previewed yesterday at selected venues, has now made its way online and awaits your judgement below. The full picture of what this reboot is doing still feels incomplete even with thi... / Continue →