Never Mind About Darren Aronofsky Doing 'Wolverine'

If something seems too good, or at least too bizarrely out-of-character, to be true, that's sometimes because it's totally not true anymore. As such: Darren Aronofsky isn't going to do that Wolverine movie after all.

The Black Swan director, who was to hoist the Wolverine franchise from the gaping hole Gavin Hood left in--a wide chasm in which Ryan Reynolds' mouthless head eternally plummets--today revealed that he won't be directing the Japan-set sequel to X-Men Origins: Wolverine. The reason? He doesn't really want to be in Japan for so long--which probably has more to do with being with his son in the wake of his separation from Rachel Weisz than it does anything about earthquakes you might be thinking.

In an official statement, Aronofsky said:

As I talked more about the film with my collaborators at Fox, it became clear that the production of 'The Wolverine' would keep me out of the country for almost a year. I was not comfortable being away from my family for that length of time. I am sad that I won't be able to see the project through, as it is a terrific script and I was very much looking forward to working with my friend, Hugh Jackman, again.

Fox responded to the news in support of his decision, calmly noting that this sure as shit isn't going to stop them from making another Wolverine movie, saying, "We will regroup and move forward aggressively."

So, congratulations, probably Brett Ratner.