Jul 23 2010New Releases: The Red Menace Hits Theaters

Turns out this weekend is a great time to reintroduce the Russian threat to your life through cinema. Here's what's coming to theaters:

Salt
Director: Phillip Noyce
Starring: Angelina Jolie
Good if you want to see: Angelina Jolie run around in a wig because maybe she's a Russian spy.

Ramona and Beezus
Director: Elizabeth Allen
Starring: Joey King, Selena Gomez
Good if you want to see: Beverly Cleary's famous character finally made accessible to the illiterate.

Life During Wartime (limited)
Director: Todd Solondz
Starring: Shirley Henderson, Ciaran Hinds, Allison Janney, Omar
Good if you want to see: the characters from Happiness portrayed by new characters in an all-new Solondz adventure that will probably still involve pedophilia, masturbation and weeping.

Countdown to Zero (limited)
Director: Lucy Walker
Good if you want to see: how we're all probably going to die in a nuclear war, despite the lessons learned from WarGames. (Russian content: includes interviews with Gobachev!)

Farewell (limited)
Director: Guillaume Canet, Emir Kusturica, Fred Ward, Willem Dafoe
Starring: Christian Carion
Good if you want to see: something with KGB agents and Fred Ward playing Reagan. Because, shit, Russia!