May 15 2009'The Expendables' Poster: Let Me Touch Up Your Tattoo
With a cast that includes Sylvester Stallone, Mickey Rourke, Jason Statham, Dolph Lundgren, Jet Li, and other guys easily capable of murder, The Expendables is definitely the upcoming movie most being described on the internet as "fucking badass." Thus, for the above first poster for the film, they've wisely shown off the badass, Expendable-themed tattoo one of the characters presumably has.
But I'm just thinking, having seen far more intense scenes depicted in Russian prison tattoos, is this really enough? I'm just thinking we could tweak this to make it slightly more appropriately badass.
Here's what I'm thinking:
A rundown of the improvements:
- No Fear (Dangerous Gear) logo.
- A hundred-dollar bill (a Benjamin).
- Smaller skulls within the larger, primary skull.
- Steve McQueen as "Bullitt."
- Cover of Guns N' Roses' 1987 album "Appetite for Destruction."
- Crow now holding a mummy riding a skateboard in its beak, and has the entire tattoo poster as its own tattoo.
Reader Comments
1. matk - May 15, 2009 2:22 PM
AAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH Starting my wknd RIGHT
THANKS!
2. Nick - May 15, 2009 2:26 PM
Aw. Come on, Mark. You couldn't do a little bit of Photoshop magic for the helicopter with nunchucks for blades?
3. Paul - May 15, 2009 3:33 PM
If you look closely, the tattoo of the picture of the tattoo has a picture of the tattoo which also has a picture of a tattoo.
4. Eric - May 15, 2009 3:34 PM
Is the sad wizard in the front?
5. Sean - May 15, 2009 3:54 PM
Watching movies like this, should be required viewing for all teen males. Shit like this could end the "Pussification" of our current society.
Take your guy friends to this movie, esspecially the ones that let their girlfriends walk all over them. This movie will be like fertilizer for their balls. In that it'll help them grow. Not that it'll make them smell like cow shit.
6. che-che - May 15, 2009 3:56 PM
@5- i wouldnt consider porn as movies, they are more like documentaries, short 3 to 15 minute free documentaries, that i find on the internet. that are good to take in about 3 to 5 minutes at a time.
7. Yes - May 15, 2009 5:57 PM
This is the greatest blog post ever.
8. His Huge Greatness Himself - May 15, 2009 6:04 PM
Who posted this photo of my back here without my legal permission?
9. Darth - May 15, 2009 6:12 PM
@9 They even photoshopped your back and made it more narrow.Otherwise it wouldn't fit between the frames.
10. Rhialto - May 15, 2009 6:16 PM
Looking forward to see this movie!
11. Beastmaster - May 15, 2009 6:17 PM
Reminds too much of the poster for the similary themed "Inglourious Basterds".
12. Beastmaster - May 15, 2009 6:18 PM
Reminds too much of the poster for the similary themed "Inglourious Basterds".
13. jared - May 16, 2009 1:52 AM
hahhahahahha
sooo good.
14. Sueyo - May 16, 2009 9:06 AM
It. Needs. Bruce. Willis.
Otherwise it is NOT "fucking badass."
15. dude - May 16, 2009 2:02 PM
Awesome, just plain hilarious.
Could've used more cowbell though.
16. TruthIsPainful - May 18, 2009 2:27 AM
I hope Sly and Dolph don't reminisce about Rocky all through the movie. Mickey Rourke kicks butt!! (I come in peace, you leave in pieces!) Dolph, where did all go wrong?? Punisher? or maybe Universal Solders? Seriously. Love ya, man. Keep rockin' in your golden years.
17. Zé Gato - May 18, 2009 6:38 AM
they should get more guys for this movie like chuck norris, steven seagal, and arnold schwarzenegger fight each other to death, that i would watch for sure..