May 21 2009'Paul Blart: Zookeeper' Gets Its Ridiculously Unlikely Love Interest
The beautiful, miniature-panty-licking Rosario Dawson has signed on to play the love interest in Kevin James's newest pedestrian job-based comedy, The Zookeeper. Because that's a believable couple. And also a thoroughly believable movie story involving animal matchmakers:
Rosario Dawson will star opposite Kevin James in romantic comedy "The Zookeeper," with Happy Madison producing along with James, Todd Garner, Jeff Sussman and Jennifer Eatz.Live actioner centers on zoo animals trying to teach the keeper their methods of dating and mating to help him win back the woman of his dreams.
Ohhhh, he's winning back Rosario Dawson. I thought he'd be wooing her for the first time. That makes sense then. He used to date Rosario Dawson, but then they broke up because he didn't know how to mate, but now the two will get back together because sentient zoo animals have since taught Kevin James animal methods of sex. That plot is sound. I see how this could work out well:
Penguin: "Insert your penis into her vagina."
Paul Blart: "I can't! I'm on a Segway! This is crazy!"
Rosario Dawson: "I love you. Again."
Announcer: "Buy The Zookeeper on DVD and Blu-ray this Tuesday."
'Zookeeper' locks up Rosario Dawson [Variety]
Reader Comments
1. wowo - May 21, 2009 11:45 AM
Ahh. She's pretty hot.
First?
2. Nick - May 21, 2009 12:01 PM
Where did this picture come from? Surely from heaven itself.
3. jaime - May 21, 2009 12:10 PM
rosario dawson, fall for kevin james?
un freaking likely!
4. whistle - May 21, 2009 12:48 PM
She wishes to perform cunnalingus on a small girl?
5. che-che - May 21, 2009 1:58 PM
am i the only one that thinks, she is a bit on the fugly side?? and has no ass. sorry. i saw that kevin smith movie that she was in, no ass.
6. ted - May 21, 2009 2:21 PM
No, you're not the only one who doesn't think she's hot. There are plenty of you gay guys out there.
7. cranktrain - May 21, 2009 2:36 PM
I would monkey sex in her butt.
8. zip - May 21, 2009 5:35 PM
Her tongue looks really big in this photo. Not just long, but big.
9. Not A Gay Guy - May 21, 2009 6:13 PM
Someone put a bridle on that thing and get it back in the barn
10. tom - May 21, 2009 7:21 PM
Back in the sex barn, maybe. She is hott!!
11. Who? - May 21, 2009 7:50 PM
are the undies for the penguin?
12. PurpleJedi - May 22, 2009 9:29 AM
Is a Kevin James/Rosario Dawson coupling any more or less believable than Woody Allen & any of the women that he's cast himself with over the years???
...and yeah...that picture is a glimpse of what must go on in Heaven.
13. Galtacticus - May 22, 2009 10:19 AM
That's quite a serious tongue!
14. Nero - May 22, 2009 10:28 AM
Does she like to lick panties?
15. r - May 22, 2009 2:48 PM
Damn, I bet she sucks a hell of a dick with that tounge.
16. Lolocaust - May 22, 2009 4:17 PM
And here I thought that nothing was more unlikely or foul than the thought of her having sex in a fast food restaurant with Brian O'Halloran.
You win this round, Kevin James.
17. jaime - May 25, 2009 9:07 PM
@12
at least woody allen is funny.
this guy is just ugly and unfunny.
18. Zyclonis - May 26, 2009 1:29 PM
'Paul Blart: Mall Cop' was not funny.
19. frank - May 29, 2009 1:41 AM
I will attend this film under the following conditions:
1. Ron Jeremy plays the voice of a donkey
2. Allison Janney plays the voice of a giraffe
3. James Earl Jones Plays the voice of a lion
4. There is an extensive subplot concerning Rosario Dawson's character attempting to put on that pair of panties.