May 19 2009'New Moon' Poster, Same Rustic Portrait Studio Backdrop
I don't know what it is about this cryptic image, but I get the feeling New Moon might hold some kind of love triangle involving Vampire Luke Perry, Angry Meathead, and Avril Lavigne Protégé. Don't ask me why. I just have this sense that we're finally going to figure out if girls prefer vampires or werewolves to not have sex with.
The Twilight Saga: New Moon Poster [Coming Soon]

Reader Comments
1. _me - May 19, 2009 11:43 AM
Is that a new moon, or is that an eclipse?
2. J - May 19, 2009 11:46 AM
I saw the movie after everyone effin' raved about it.... I still don't see the draw. Vampires who defy all Vampire logic. A stoner chick who loves the resident bad boy. Baseball games instead of battle....
What am I missing out on?
3. JoMama - May 19, 2009 11:47 AM
OF THE HEART! HIYOOOOOO~!
4. Kay - May 19, 2009 11:47 AM
Needs more Redneck gang raping
5. Nick - May 19, 2009 12:58 PM
I will give these movies this: Kristen Stewart is hot.
6. Stuey - May 19, 2009 1:21 PM
HAHA @ Kay.
Yeah I watched this just to see what the hoopla was about. I was unimpressed and turned it off after the baseball scene. Softball whatever.
This genre is catered to over weight teen girls. Show me a fat chick NOT wearing a twilight tee shirt.
7. Joe - May 19, 2009 1:51 PM
Stuey is correct - the Twilight series caters to not only overweight girls, but to homely/insecure/socially awkward girls/women.
Why? Very simple: Vampires are romantic creatures, so you have that angle. So the guy has superpowers and rescue her - "My boyfriend can beat up you boyfriend" stuff - an ego stroke for girls. On top of that, the guy can't have sex with you, because he cant control himself (he's suck her blood/life away), so this is the constrained and chaste relationship these girls/women yearn for - "I want the superstud who just will cuddle and kiss, because real sex is so icky; he must really love me if he can't put his penis in me".
It's all the typical incongruent expectations women put out there for guys. Guys don't meet that ideal, so these girls immerse themselves in Twilight, and gossip about it with their other girlfriends. A few of them even look at pictures of Patterson and flick their bean.
Guys, on the other hand, just want to blow up evil robots, and then bang the hot chick. Of course, the reality is, they watch the evil robots get blown up, then go home and jerk it to pictures of Kristen Stewart.
It would be a lot of easier if guys and girls just admitted their fantasies, accepted reality, respected each other, and still had lots of wild monkey sex.
But the entertainment industry makes too much money making you feel like a loser, so support the economy and keep lapping it up.
8. J - May 19, 2009 2:12 PM
Kristen Stewart can not get any hotter than when she was dying in Panic Room. And she was 12 or whatever and you thought she was a boy until halfway through the movie.
9. What?! - May 19, 2009 2:15 PM
so... is the other dude a wearwolf that defies all wearwolf logic?
10. J - May 19, 2009 3:48 PM
@What?!
I'm sure he only becomes a warewolf when it rains or something. Or he can channel it at will or he won't be a full warewolf, only slightly hairier so as to not obscure his tween face.
Also, I think that a Twilight Warewolf can only be killed by a broken heart or some other pussy emo shit.
11. Rhialto - May 19, 2009 4:00 PM
From my own experience in real life,many girls like to be taken doggy.So i guess vampires are at the second row this time.
12. Darth - May 19, 2009 4:04 PM
The ultimate vampire or werewolf takes a girl doggy while giving her the neck bite at the same time.
13. Bob Barker - May 19, 2009 4:17 PM
That chick is butt ugly.
14. Jack - May 19, 2009 5:18 PM
Fuck I love reading ignorant comments.
15. Nick - May 19, 2009 6:30 PM
Actually, all the chicks I know that are obsessed with Twilight are attractive and have boyfriends. I guess that's just because I don't associate with creepy fatties.
16. Sprouting Sprouts - May 20, 2009 2:26 AM
Aw way to ruin the fact that the other kid is a werewolf!
17. Bladedemon - May 20, 2009 5:43 AM
@7 Not that I like Twilight. or wish to defend the series in anyway, but if you're going to take this piss out of something with a ridiculously long post, you should probably know what you're talking about, at least in terms of what happens in the books.
Guess what? There's sex. No you look retarded.
@15 Yeah, same here. Pretty much every girl I know has read them or is reading them or at least watched the film. I think you just have to be a girl to get it. Being male immediately excludes you from it though. This, I would remind all the males, is a good thing.
We've got Joss Whedon's Angel (Cordy, Fred, blonde werewolf girl - they're all hotter than Kristen Whatever anyway) and we've got Hellsing, Buffy, Vampire Hunter D, Blade and whatever else you can think of, so really, who wins, the girls or the boys?
That's right. The boys.
18. Meg - May 20, 2009 9:41 AM
Damn I hate this series. And sometimes I feel like the only girl who does...Ah well.
19. Sueyo - May 20, 2009 10:48 AM
#19, you are NOT alone. I hate Twilight with a burning passion, and I'm a girl.
20. His Huge Greatness Himself - May 20, 2009 11:59 AM
Why are girls always begging me to take them doggie? Aren't there any other positions? Or do i look that much like a werewolf?
21. megs - May 20, 2009 12:08 PM
@7
your clearly an asshole who has nothing better to do with his life than post ridiculously long comments about something he has no idea about which is sex because you've clearly never had it and have to vent your frustration by making fun of girls who happened to take an interest in a certain book series that you don't like because girls prefer a fantastical character over you.
@18
i hate u :)
22. Bren - May 20, 2009 7:33 PM
I can answer that for you, duh, werewolves, otherwise why don't I just shag something else that's dead? Though... Oldman. I would definitely shag Oldman
23. gabdar - May 21, 2009 12:33 AM
"This genre is catered to over weight teen girls. Show me a fat chick NOT wearing a twilight tee shirt." LAWLSS
and
19 and 20.
AGREED.
I watched this after my little sister rented it, and am apparantly THE only girl (i know) who hates it / this entire series.
24. Rossi - May 21, 2009 11:04 AM
I know non-fat chicks that read Twilight.
They're just dumb as shit instead.
25. Erika - May 26, 2009 9:14 PM
Wow, really? Weight has nothing to do with interests. teenage girls in general like this Twilight crap because it's interesting to them. ''Oh look, perfect guy who notices a normal girl who's completely normal. They live happily ever after.'' Yeah.
Just for reference, I'm a teenage girl who doesn't like Twilight.
26. wendy - August 2, 2009 4:24 AM
they only forgot 1 mayor thing in the poster.
Isn't Jacobs Hair Suppose To Be Long???!!!