Mar 13 2009'The Orphan' Trailer: It's the Anti-Adoption Horror Film of the Year!
Scoot over, Damien and Macaulay Culkin; there's a new sadistic child in town, and this puritan-looking little girl is about to scare an entire generation of prospective parents out of ever adopting. Meet The Orphan:
Some adoptions are so evil that they don't leave a paper trail, even though we saw the family go through the proper adoption steps earlier.
Just remember, everyone, orphanages aren't human pounds. You don't want to rush in and grab the first kid that paints something for you. ALWAYS SCREEN YOUR ORPHANS.
Reader Comments
1. Nick - March 13, 2009 2:16 PM
Is her secret that she totally loves Miley Cyrus?
2. Kevin - March 13, 2009 2:23 PM
Didn't Vera Farmiga already make this movie? It just feels like they changed the bad kid from a litle Jewey brat to a little Jewey cunt.
3. Elmo - March 13, 2009 2:32 PM
what a weird chin
4. Nick - March 13, 2009 2:34 PM
I get what you're saying. Her secret is that she's Jay Leno's illegitimate daughter.
5. Daniel - March 13, 2009 3:05 PM
Ew, what an unappealing cast. If these two came to adopt me my answer would be "move along, move along please"
6. DrNecropolis - March 13, 2009 3:05 PM
You should always remember to get your orphan spayed and neutered as well
7. jakal - March 13, 2009 4:56 PM
"What, me worry?"
8. Doug Nelson - March 13, 2009 7:58 PM
Hmm, lemme guess: she's a clone, and clones don't have souls.
9. Lowlands - March 13, 2009 8:00 PM
This looks quite a hot movie to me! Maybe we're going to watch it!
10. Stu - March 13, 2009 10:40 PM
Given that they already have kids when they adopt this one, it would make this movie totally awesome if Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt starred in it...as themselves.
11. ffdsfsdfsdfs - March 14, 2009 1:39 PM
whats up with all these recent FEAR THE KIDS CAUSE THEY ARE EVIL movies? society's got a problem!
12. sully - March 14, 2009 1:47 PM
@8 But she doesn't KNOW she's a clone.
also, did anyone else go "AW SHIT!" and snap their fingers when that girl did the bo-peep joke?
finally, I saw the mom in her bra and panties while comfortably numb played in the background. aw yeah
13. Beastman AIDS - March 16, 2009 4:59 PM
The problem with movies about evil kids is that an adult can bust a kids chops no problem. If some kid was trying to give me satan eyes i'd karate chop his/her spine. Especially if the kid was an orphan.
14. Good Son - March 18, 2009 3:34 PM
how come hollywood keeps recreating terrible movies?
15. Follicleman - March 26, 2009 4:57 PM
Now you know why Angelina went all the way to Africa. What's the last time you've seen a movie about a possessed/evil BLACK kid?
...not counting Gary Coleman.
16. dory - May 22, 2009 10:00 PM
She's not evil - she's just pissed off cause she lives in one of the 44 states that refuse to give adoptees their birth certificates.
17. Cathy Doheny - Charlotte International Adoption Examiner - May 25, 2009 1:42 PM
I have just published an article on the topic. Please feel free to read and comment.
http://www.examiner.com/x-7928-Charlotte-International-Adoption-Examiner~y2009m5d23-Adoption-horror-movie-Orphan-to-be-released-by-Warner-Brothers
18. Scott - June 9, 2009 3:59 PM
Here secret is the band around her neck is actually keeping her head on. It was severed years ago and she is extremely pissed off about having to wear the scarf all damn movie
19. Coffee_Muse - July 19, 2009 12:52 PM
Screw the evil orphan stuff...I just want to see some Sarsgaard!
20. yeyo king - July 23, 2009 2:43 AM
hahaha the truth is ahes a 33 yr old prostitute that has dwarfism and the scarf is to cover her neck cuz she was in a aslyum
21. gianna - July 24, 2009 8:47 PM
omg her secret is shes the devils demon soul collecter or a DDSC she hides in orphanages that dont even know shes there and then she tricks people into adapting her so she can collect there souls and move on. If she is killed then another child is killed and the devil chooses them to be there DDSC. there u go there is the big secret.
22. jenny - July 29, 2009 4:04 PM
YOU PEOPLE ARE SO GAY THIS IS A GREAT MOVIE! AND U SHOULD C IT B4 JUDGING ASSES!
23. vanna - August 4, 2009 1:55 AM
yall are gay this movie was awesome
24. nonya - August 15, 2009 4:37 PM
i noe wat happened she is a 33 year old worman!!!! duh