Paying Fugitive Directors to Make Commercials for Fake Products is Art

greed-williams-portman.jpg

Questionable artist Francesco Vezzoli commissioned famed rapist director Roman Polanski to make this 60-second ad for the perfume Greed, which is not a real perfume. Why? Because it's a statement, man. Art. It's like when I ordered all those pizzas for a party that no one was ever going to attend. The statement I was making was "I don't have any friends, so I'm going to eat a shit-ton of pizza."

I'll tell you up front, this non-existent perfume is so hot that Michelle Williams and Natalie Portman have a catfight over it. The lesson is that truly great scents have the power to destroy even the strongest hair-brushing buddy relationship.