Jan 6 2009The Closest I'll Come to a Year-End List Thing
I don't really get into the whole end-of-year "top ten best/worst films" thing. It seems like a lot of pointless work to summarize the year into ten good or bad things when I've already spent the entire year telling you how there were probably ten good things and everything else bad things. Also, I'm a fool, so I'd definitely be wrong about most everything, and you don't need my fool opinion stacked on the thousands of others--particularly when there are "Most Insanely Apple-esque Silverhawk Vehicles" lists to get to.
But what I will do is point you to the "top ten best/worst film" list I've most enjoyed reading so far: this one, by Ricky Gervais's writing/directing collaborator on This Side of the Truth, Matt Robinson. Though I don't entirely agree with his rankings (that's what makes lists fun?), his arguments for them almost convince me. I wouldn't normally place Ghost Town as a top-ten movie, but when I'm told "the ending makes me well up with tears like a little girl-gay," I'll maybe reconsider, and start using that phrase.
So read it, and feel free to mention any other reasonable year-end movie lists in the comments.
Reader Comments
1. TetterkeT - January 6, 2009 3:57 PM
Yeah, I hate to admit it, but Ghost Town is a pretty funny/good little movie. Fuck you, Ricky Gervais.
2. Chris - January 6, 2009 4:01 PM
Gimme your top ten lists, go!
3. Connor - January 6, 2009 4:48 PM
I liked Ghost Town a bit (if I were pitching it, I would have used the phrase, "Did you think the Sixth Sense could have been funnier?") but I don't think it's top ten.
I also don't agree with a lot of his bottom ten. I mean sure, a lot of those films aren't that great, but there were much worse films. I think usually I'm more angry at bottom ten films, because no one sees the truly terrible films.
Also, Owen Wilson was going to be in McConaughey's role, not Black's.
4. Elmo - January 6, 2009 4:51 PM
Hey I know- the Dark Knight!
everyone loved that movie.. or they should. but damn if I remember anything else from last year...
5. proteon - January 6, 2009 5:14 PM
"The closest I'll come" in this case equals "an exact". Like:
Welcome to mcdonalds can i interest you in a value meal?
"No".
What can I get for you sir.
"Listen this is the closest I'll come to eating this crap: give me three double cheese and a mcchicken."
What I'd prefer from this site though it's admittedly less driven by the hatred of promo posters - is a hit and miss tally ie: how many movies that you/"we" said would suck were awesome and vice versa.
6. Nick - January 6, 2009 5:28 PM
At least "One Guy, One Jar" was not included on either list.
7. smarterthenyou - January 6, 2009 5:43 PM
@#5 what the fuck are you talking about, it's not his list
stop being a dumb dumb dummy
8. Jess - January 6, 2009 6:00 PM
My top films:
Let The Right One In
Frost/Nixon
Wall-E
The Strangers
Cloverfield
JCVD
9. Daniel - January 6, 2009 7:06 PM
Speed racer is so far ahead of our time that to not like it is to not understand it?
You mine as well say, "you infidels are not worthy of the Wachoswki brothers genius, the Matrix Trilogy was brilliant, you're wrong."
And Kung Fu Panda? Most overrated movie ever. Can someone justify to me why ANY of the animals were significant? It was only for cuteness, the fact that they were animals was completely incidental, and had no bearing on the plot. It could have been Kung Fu squirrel. I hate everyone.
10. Brant - January 6, 2009 7:36 PM
Cheeky little fellow, isn't he?
11. truth - January 6, 2009 7:52 PM
a jew with a barfing dick.. at first i thought this was just for shock value, but then i actually imagined a rabbi with mort from family guys voice going "aohh mahy gawd, my dick jast keeps ahn bawfing sooo much!" and hes right, it did produce a chuckle..
12. fancy - January 6, 2009 11:19 PM
Ho9w could anyone ANYONE like speed racer - it was such a stinker i turned it off mid way and had to apologize to all of my roomates for having suggested it, it was sooooooooo bad! It looked like the Flintstone movie so the comment about its originality is total bullocks, it was flintstones with racing, and the racing was just video game graphics so it was just a poorly made cgi crap fest in sparkling neon colors complete with shit acting.
otherwise sure the list was well written and mildly amusing, i may have to check out the 2 or 3 flicks he mentions which i haven't caught yet, though not sure i should be taking advice from a guy who like speed racer...
13. Adam P. - January 6, 2009 11:38 PM
Fantastic, unpretentious and intelligent list.
I'm glad to see your support for Speed Racer--I was writing an undergrad thesis on digital cinema when it came out and ended up dedicating nearly a whole chapter to how revolutionary and amazing it was. I am also extremely tired of defending it. As far as I'm concerned, it's the first digital movie to actually use the new technology to alter film grammar and not just supplement it.
Anyway, not to get all praise-y, but this reminds me why I love this website. Kudos.
14. Grant - January 7, 2009 7:22 AM
But...he left out Mamma-Mia!!!
That aside, I liked the special affects of Speed Racer, it WAS a movie of the future, yes, yes, yes...For that it deserves awards.
What irritated me was I hated about half the characters. I hate small children and animals in movies that are supposed to be geared at, you know, older people. But they threw in the monkey and the kid so small children could have a reason to see it I think. Urg. John Goodman, even the amazing Susan Sarandon bugged me too. And the effeminate English/German villain guy was annoying. So yes, bad writing made me hate Speed Racer. I loved the effects though. If I could watch it with the sound turned off, I'd like it more.
15. Jessica - January 7, 2009 7:59 AM
"1. Twilight -- Dear Fat Girls of America, I know times are tough. I know how it feels to be overweight, and unpopular, to feel that no one really understands you and to wallow away at night, lying in your big bed, snacking and wishing there was an effeminate vampire boy-child to come steal you away and show you how shiny he looks in the sunlight. (I don't). "
O man, that is the funniest and most accurate judgment I've ever heard. :D