Oct 7 2008A Grid Detailing How Money Has Been Flushed Down the Toilet
I was just looking at Box Office Mojo, seeing if Get Smart really made enough to warrant a sequel (sadly, it did), and I noticed a link to the above chart on the front page. Is this depressing to anyone else? Just that Disney alone has made enough talking dog movies to warrant a comparison grid is bad, but seeing exactly how much people have paid into this detestable genre is vomit in my face holes. I mean, just the idea that talking dogs in a movie is not a bizarre anomaly but an entire genre, that's awful. But dogs playing human sports is a separate genre from that! Those are two individual things that, as a society, we've decided we want to see repeatedly. Forget drama, comedy, romance--we don't need them. Let's just find more things for dogs to do unexpectedly. Dogs doing construction? Driving bulldozers, mixing concrete? Have we done that yet? Let's do that then. Then let's make a grid detailing exactly which dog construction movies made the most money, and let's stop making any more entertainment.
Reader Comments
1. Elmo - October 7, 2008 1:00 PM
that's vomit in everyone's faceholes
2. Camelai - October 7, 2008 2:38 PM
Actually, the dogs in Eight Below don't talk... it's a true story drama. But for the rest? Agreed.
3. Marj - October 7, 2008 2:42 PM
I'm with Camelai... one of these things is not like the others, and that's "Eight Below." It shouldn't be tarred by the same brush.
4. B - October 7, 2008 3:37 PM
Agreed with #'s 2&3. At least those dogs didn't talk (even though we wish Paul Walker wouldn't either...)
5. Nick - October 7, 2008 4:18 PM
Paul Walker IS a talking dog. Get your facts straight.
6. Jason - October 7, 2008 4:51 PM
So that is where the bailout money went to.
7. mtk - October 7, 2008 5:06 PM
Every time I look at that "Valkyrie Trailer" thumbnail at top right, I see Corey Feldman, not Tom Cruise. Am I the only one?
8. K - October 7, 2008 5:40 PM
What are you talking about -- Tim Allen as a talking dog? Comedy genius.
Or not.
BTW, I totally ganked this on my blog but gave you all the credit. Funny stuff.
9. rolone - October 7, 2008 8:43 PM
that's not vomit in everyone's faceholes at all.
It's an old news now. I've seen some details before at **Fitness Loving. Com**. There also has some hot stars profile with their photoes and blogs.
10. momboelitist - October 8, 2008 10:11 AM
These "DISNEY" movies are in most cases made for children and families. I know in this liberal oriented time that only adult idiots 17 to 25 are important but lets not assume that every movie has to target that particular audience.
You could say the same thing about horribly bad spoof movies.
11. B - October 8, 2008 1:44 PM
What does that have to do with being "liberal oriented"? I'm 25 and (sadly) still love kids movies...but the talking animal ones sometimes go a little too far. I mean, it's not like Homeward Bound where you just hear the animals thoughts; and it's not like the cartoons with talking animals. Those somehow are ok (to me). Sometimes movies are just badly made and these are a few of the examples...
And we do say the same thing about horribly bad spoof movies. Look at our comments on "Disaster Movie"....
12. momboelitist - October 8, 2008 3:56 PM
@11, I'm talking directly to the IWS guy. As for Hollywood, it does target liberals from 17 to 25. Your claim to be an exception doesn't make it any less true.
By the way, I loved talking animal movies when I was a little kid....as it should be.
13. alllies - October 11, 2008 1:34 PM
I definitely wasn't thinking 8 below belonged on there, not a bad animal movie, the dogs don't talk and technically don't do anything like most animals in disney movies do, besides navigate the wilderness, which, If I'm not mistaken, animals tend to do a little bit on their own every once in awhile.
14. Muffy - October 13, 2008 1:42 AM
Not all talkin' dog films are bad.