Sep 17 2008Maybe 'xXx 3' Will Be About Extreme Skin Grafting
When xXx: Hey, Xander Cage, which was the name of the main character, is back! was announced last week, several commenters were quick to point out that in xXx 2: Ice Cube, it's revealed that Vin Diesel was killed on a mission. But did you guys realize that on the director's cut of the DVD, there's a horrible short film where you can see the actual death of Xander (as portrayed by a suspiciously silent body double only shown from behind)? You probably didn't, because no one buys the xXx director's cut, but if you had, you'd have seen Xander enters a building, and then the building explodes! And if you're thinking he could have made it out, you're way off. How do I know? Because the section of neck flesh that bears the xXx tattoo is blown clear of the debris and held up to the camera! Insanity:
Why have no lingerie girls ever said they're going to fuck me until my eyeballs implode? Oh, right, because that's a really bizarre thing to say to someone.
(via /Film)
Reader Comments
1. TetraShiva - September 17, 2008 3:12 PM
Wow. That was lame.
Comebacks in movies are going to start being worse than comic books.
2. Chris - September 17, 2008 3:19 PM
One word: doppelganger.
3. Learn To Swim - September 17, 2008 3:21 PM
That wasn't a parody?
4. Eville1 - September 17, 2008 3:43 PM
Nice tits on the girl though. The rest? Dumb as shit.
5. Berndog - September 17, 2008 4:30 PM
Was that "xXx: Plan 9 From Outer Space?"
6. Keithypoo - September 17, 2008 5:27 PM
Vin Diesel should have stayed where he ended up in Saving Private Ryan, f**kin DEAD in some foreign country so we would not have had to deal with 2Super Fast, Too shaved furious, and all the other garbage he's been in.
7. he's been using brand x - September 17, 2008 9:51 PM
That's about as hot as someone telling you they'll fuck you until your dick falls off.
8. AZ - September 18, 2008 3:02 AM
The only acceptable thing about this was the Rammstein song.
9. Snoodle - September 18, 2008 4:21 AM
'Xander Cage' still sounds like a fake name a go-go boy would take :p
10. fdsfdsfr4d - September 18, 2008 6:21 AM
that was so fuckin lame. i cant believe someone would a) spend money on producing this and b) money to watch this.
PEOPLE ARE FUCKIN DUMB AS SHIT.
11. Matt - September 18, 2008 9:46 AM
OHHH Can the title please be:
"XXX III"
PLEASE!!
12. MOSkito - September 18, 2008 9:58 AM
#7 it works for Paris Hilton
13. sharpie - September 18, 2008 1:10 PM
1:13, it turns into softcore porn.
music and all
14. Mike - September 18, 2008 4:50 PM
I feel more dumber for having watched that... crap, it's already affecting my English!!!
15. Randy Siplon - September 20, 2008 3:28 AM
4 minutes and 13 seconds of my life that I will never get back.