Jun 5 2008Meet the Vampires of 'Lost Boys 2'
Sure, you know Corey Feldman's Edgar Frog character, but do you know the new vampires of Lost Boys 2: The Tribe's vampire tribe? I know you don't. So let me introduce you to them through biographies I've invented based entirely on these photos.
Trey (above) - A sensitive artist with long, flowing hair, puppy dog eyes, and a nose with a urethra, his skills at moody poetry and simple acoustic guitar have coerced many a lady to their untimely death. Trey is often compared to James Blunt because of his similar musical sensibilities, and to Dracula because that's the only other vampire most people can easily think of.
Terrence - The incorrigible jokester of the group, Terrence's ill-timed quips have been known to have his vampire posse laughing a gruesome spray of blood out their nose on more than one occasion. Like this one time when he bit into this fat guy's neck, and he was all like, "Daaaamn! This dude blood taste like Ragu!" Classic Terrence.
Barth - The retarded one.
H'DUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
The Vampires of Lost Boy 2 [/Film]
Reader Comments
1. e. - June 5, 2008 6:52 PM
lmfao. so apropos. i recently re-watched "lost boys" because i was feeling nostalgic and i loved it when i was about 14. i was forcibly reminded that many 80s movies were sadly lacking in plot and even lots of dialogue. i would say half of that movie was a musical montage.
2. kimmy4lsu - June 5, 2008 7:04 PM
he looks like one of the Geico Cavemen.....hmmmm
3. delic8 - June 5, 2008 7:05 PM
half? I'd estimate three-fourths.
that said, it is still pretty fucking rad--especially when just slightly drunk.
4. boo - June 5, 2008 7:29 PM
We are living in a Post-Buffy world.
5. Snoodle - June 5, 2008 7:51 PM
Their make-up jobs are not agreeing with me...
6. heather m. - June 5, 2008 8:04 PM
I've gotta say- i'm a huge fan of the first ' Lost Boys', but this just looks ridiculous! More Buffy than "have some rice, Michael!". Were they going for camp or what? Ugh. Now i'm just sad. At least that's one more crappy movie to miss!
7. Elmo - June 5, 2008 8:34 PM
why do all vampires now-a-days look like inbred southerners???
I'm an artist, and that is most insulting when these bastards get paid for that shit
8. arnny - June 5, 2008 10:22 PM
I'm guessing the last 2 pics are of Kiefer's brother Angus. I have a feeling he's the link to the vampires from the first movie. I don't know what to think of this movie. The 1st issue of the comic being put out by Wildstorm (which is being written by the screenwriters of this movie) was actually pretty good.
9. Joey - June 5, 2008 11:52 PM
Holy crap that was funny! You actually made me LOL at work. :) Best one I've read in a long time.
Now if I could only laugh as hard at the movie...
10. demented - June 6, 2008 1:54 AM
Cripes, I can see the top of that first guy's prosthesis. Yo, makeup people, ever heard of glue?
11. Mr V - June 6, 2008 9:20 AM
My immediate thought upon seeing the picture at the top:
Carrot-top? Wtf are you doing here?
12. dude - June 6, 2008 10:46 AM
It's so awesome to see this summer's vampire sporting the fashionable "face clitoris" (top pic) under his bottom lip.
13. dude - June 6, 2008 10:47 AM
these are the funniest comments LMAO
good job, superfish writer.
14. Dracula Jones - June 6, 2008 11:01 AM
Genuine LOL at "This dude blood taste like Ragu!"
15. yobizzatch - June 6, 2008 11:56 AM
The last two (barth?) look like Larry Birkhead.
16. Cool - June 7, 2008 6:58 AM
This movie is just.....nothin special....they just wanna make some quick money....
nothin to be excited
17. mrs.billy wirth(ilovedwayne) - September 11, 2009 11:48 AM
this movie is fucking retarded! how dare they try to ruin the original lost boys with this bullshit?! the vampires look stupid and unrealistic.