May 6 2008'WALL-E' Teaches Children More Horrible Lessons in Trash Collection
The issue with Pixar's latest character, WALL-E--a robot that collects trash--is that videos like this one, in which he interacts with a pair of discarded headphones, teach kids that it's alright to play with refuse. How long until some kids pick up a set of headphones with a hypodermic needle inside, and instead of hearing a jaunty tune, they're greeted by the haunting voice of a psychopath: "Welcome to the world of cute robot AIDS," he says, before revealing he also has a hook hand.
Reader Comments
1. GiantDrunkenRobot - May 6, 2008 1:01 PM
Oh my goodness.
As some of you may know, I've been hating on WALL-E for a couple months solid now. I've seen fit to express that hatred in rage-filled rants in the comments section here and at other related sites, and many of you superfans have staunchly defended your adorable little robo-buddy against my vitriol.
It's now time for me to extend my apologies to you. You're right, and you've been right all along.
I never realized until just now that the little robot is retarded, and that's why everybody thinks he's so goddamn cute.
I always forget how much America loves a retard, especially a good-natured, kind-hearted retard who teaches us all a valuable lesson about our own capacity for love. WALL-E is the Rudy/I Am Sam/Forrest Gump/Radio of the future. Forgive me for not recognizing that until now.
2. Erik - May 6, 2008 1:21 PM
GiantDrunkenRobot
You're an idiot. Don't ever breed. This is a kid's movie that adults can enjoy. I'm sorry your mom stopped breastfeeding you at age 1 and you've decided to spend your life being a giant assclown curmudgeon and belittling everything.
3. Kaye - May 6, 2008 1:34 PM
Dear GiantDrunkenRobot,
Your google-hunting skills for big words is awesome. I lurve you.
PS
I'm sorry you got molested by a robot (or a guy in a cardboard box) when you were young.
4. Giantdrunkenrobot - May 6, 2008 3:31 PM
Thank you all for your healing words.
I hope that one day your own inspiring stories can be adapted into feel-good animated features, so that a new generation of 'tard-lovers can delight at your heartwarming antics.
5. dave - May 6, 2008 3:45 PM
Giant drunken robot...You used to be annoying, but now you are delightful. I understand where you are coming from now. It's quite obvious.
People treat you like they do wall*E. That is to say, they see you as simple and cute when you try to do big person things. They think you don't have the ability to intellectually impress. You hate being treated this way, and you resent Wall*E for existing and reinforcing that attitude.
I will no longer be mad at what you say or argue with your point of view. I understand where you are in your life and it must be tough. One day I'm sure you'll be taken serious in your real life. Until then, keep in posting anonymously on the internet in order to achieve the kind of attention you want and deserve.
Go Giantdrunkenrobot...GO!
6. Giantdrunkenrobot - May 6, 2008 4:50 PM
Dear Dave and the WALL-E Superfans-
I've tried smacking the Disney/Pixar dick out of your mouth on several occasions, but you all just keep going back for more. Frankly, it's getting a bit exhausting and your comebacks are barely worth the initial effort I put in to insulting you.
I promise that as soon as it stops being fun to ridicule this film and the adult fanboys who so lovingly worship it, I'll quit.
Thanks for being there for me,
-Giantdrunkenrobot
7. dave - May 6, 2008 5:40 PM
Yeah! That's the giantdrunkenrobot I know! Keep on with the insults and exaggerations. Do it as long as you need to until you get better. We all wish the best for you and hope one day people in the "outside" world take you seriously. Until then, use whatever methods you must to keep from falling into a massive despair.
Go GDR! GO!
8. 420 - May 6, 2008 8:01 PM
Hey, so... did you guys catch that latest WALL-E video? Cool.
9. Dave too - May 7, 2008 6:27 PM
Yes, moving on...
Judging by how he dances, Wall-E is clearly inhabited by a white person.
10. cldx - May 22, 2008 5:21 AM
Uuuumm...how come you freak out over this movie? If you dont like it, dont watch it? I dont really care if you spill hate speech about Wall-E or other animated features or whatever movie, im just wondering why you invest time in getting into a rage about something you obviously dont give a rats ass about! It doesnt make sense dude, go be productive for a change.
Oh and if anybody sees a kid playing with AIDS-infected headphones, blame the parents for letting their kid play in the trashbin or blame the junkie that left it there but not an virtual robot, thats throwing stones at flies IMO and we both should know the problem will neither be resolved nor made worse due to the "Message" of this Movie.
Yeah i love retarded movies, makes me feel smart once in a while ;)