May 19 2008George Lucas Threatens Us with 'Indiana Jones 5'
Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull may not come out until Thursday, but renowned trilogy-diluter George Lucas already has already mentioned plans to see if he can stretch the straining whip of Indiana Jones just a little bit further. If you're like me, you heard this and immediately thought, "Alright, fine. I put up with three flaccid entries in the Star Wars series; I can live through a few more shameful continuations of beloved series. Just tell me you're not doing the 'Shia LaBeouf is the new Indy' thing everyone worried about. Give me that much." But, of course, he couldn't give me that much. Straight from the mouth of the bearded tube protruding from flannel:
I haven't even told Steven [Spielberg] or Harrison this, but I have an idea to make Shia [LaBeouf] the lead character next time and have Harrison come back like Sean Connery did in the last movie. I can see it working out.
You can see it working out, eh? What gives you that impression? The tepid reception Kingdom of the Crystal Skull is getting? The fact that having a non-Indiana Jones lead in an Indiana Jones movie would remove the single expectation fans foolishly assumed you could consistently meet? The gust you felt across your beard as Earth sighed? I'm going to let this go for now, and hope this is Lucas's idea of a joke. Unfortunately, having seen all the Star Wars films, I know it's impossible that he could be that funny.
Reader Comments
1. oh no - May 19, 2008 3:30 PM
Oh no. Say it ain't so. Shia as the next main role? I for one would never watch it. I'd rather stick my whip in a crystal skull packed with pit vipers.
2. SlyAndTheFamilyStallone - May 19, 2008 3:40 PM
The Flanneled One must be stopped. His reign of terror has gone on for far, far too long. However, if we kill him, two more George Lucas' will take his place...they'll be CGI, of course.
3. The Gorgeous One - May 19, 2008 3:52 PM
This post makes me sad. :(
4. Alexander Verrone - May 19, 2008 4:36 PM
This sounds more like TV than the movies! That's the kind of cheap stunt they would attempt with a defunct TV series. In case Lucas failed to notice, the franchise is titled after an INDIVIDUAL: Indiana Jones! That's a specific character -- like James Bond is a specific character!
5. JagedNS - May 19, 2008 4:58 PM
Fuck you George Lucas and fuck you Shia Labeouf.
That trainwreck of a so called actor is the only reason I won't set foot in a theatre to see this movie or any other movie involving him for that reason. The reason being? one word: Transformers
6. Evan Haase - May 19, 2008 5:21 PM
the apocaplypse is upon us
7. D.W. Frydendall - May 19, 2008 5:46 PM
Oh sweet fuck NO!
Shia LaBeouf is a complete jack-off who needs to be stopped. That would be one perfect way to assassinate one of my favorite film series of all time.
Thanks George!
8. Bird - May 19, 2008 5:54 PM
I kind of hate George Lucas...sure he brought you Indy and Star Wars but he is just so arrogant that he cant just go back to his ranch and breed fancy dogs or whatever retired douchebags do...
Ugh, i feel a little sick inside
9. pdrunk - May 19, 2008 8:24 PM
I was going to say here that I look forward to an "Indy V" just to see Shia and Jar Jar in a rape shower scene, but then I thought maybe they can hire Hayden Christensen to come and wuss it up some more.
10. Connor - May 19, 2008 9:14 PM
George Lucas is an asshat.
11. Deborah - May 19, 2008 11:23 PM
If Shia's character is the lead shouldnt the movie be called "Mutt Williams and the Golden Hammer and Sickle"
Doesnt really have the same ring to it as Indiana Jones. They should have given his character a way better name than Mutt??
12. Fuzzbutt - May 20, 2008 4:36 AM
NOOOOOOOOO!!!!
13. marion - May 20, 2008 1:32 PM
omg. Lucas ploting films!! What will be next...?? White bread?
14. Otowner - May 20, 2008 2:01 PM
All valid comments, save for this. "Tepid reception."
The reviews are mostly good (rottentomatoes). The BO is predicted to be record-breaking.
So as much as I hate the idea of Shia and the Last Crusade, the reasons are right there in front of you.
Never happen, though. Unlike Lucas and Ford, Spielberg has more interesting stuff to do.
15. kompleet - May 20, 2008 8:22 PM
Hi, I just came back from the theatre where I've seen Indy 4 and... IT SUCKS ! The worst Spielberg movie ever, I'm so disappointed..............
(Sorry for any bad english, Im french. )
16. KTPendragon - June 23, 2008 3:20 AM
Well, I'd LOVE a fifth one! I really, really liked the fourth one and I hope they make more. If they didn't I would be sad :(
Besides, Lucas is cool.
I adore Mutt - he's so funny. Espeically the whole "I'll comb my hair first, THEN you can kill me," thing. That was great! Anyway, I'd definitely go see a fifth one if it came out, BUT...
I do agree that they should not get rid of Indy so soon. He should be the main character in the next one, definitely. If they do more than a fifth, if they go onto a sixth or even a seventh, THEN they should make Mutt the main character and change the name to "Mutt Williams and the blah blah blah", or maybe they could change Mutt's name to Indy, or maybe it could be "Mutt Jones and the blah blah blah..."
Anyway, to recap, I like George Lucas and I like Shia Whatisname and I like Mutt and I like the fourth movie and I'd go watch ehe fifth one (and the sixth and the seventh and the eighth and the ninth until they stopped).
Yaaaaay!
17. KTPendragon - June 23, 2008 3:25 AM
You know something funny? Someone told me the next one was coming out like a year ago and I was like,
"What? Isn't Harrison Ford dead?"
Everyone in the room kinda laughed at me and I was like,
"Oh - I thought he was dead!"
That's how old I thought he was! But then I saw number four and I was really glad that they didn't try and downplay how old he was. It's setting it up for Mutt to come in and help out and I like that. I hope that they make another movie and I really hope they keep Mutt!
Mutt's so cool.
And BTW, a million and three thumbs up to Crystal Skull, it was great, only alien-featuring movie I've ever enjoyed! Well done Speilburg!
(Is that how you spell his name?)
18. Mark - July 11, 2008 11:02 AM
Indy 4 was better than Temple of Doom. But thats not saying much because so is wiping your ass with a broken bottle! I liked Indy 4 but if Lucas actually makes an Indy 5...please God..don't let him make Shia LaBeouf the next Indiana Jones. LaBeoufs character is an immature, impetuous douchebag with all the charisma of Lenny and Squiggy from Laverne and Shirley!
George..ya really wanna F*** up the franchise?..Yeah...go ahead and let this punk jackass be your next Indy. Hell, while you're at it..let Uwe Boll direct it for ya. If Lucas actually passes the torch on to LaBeouf...not only will I NOT see the movie...I will be thoroughly convinced that dementia has stolen the once brilliant mind of George Lucas. I can only hope that such a cinematic abomination BOMBS at the box office and indicates to Lucas to hang up his camera and RETIRE!
19. Marcus Browdy - January 9, 2009 12:09 PM
George, if you read these things, please, just hurry it up and make it good! Remember how good you used to be and actually care this time instead of making some cropped cgi mess!
20. Marcus Browdy - January 9, 2009 12:10 PM
George, if you read these things, please, just hurry it up and make it good! Remember how good you used to be and actually care this time instead of making some cropped cgi mess!
21. Jason N. - May 11, 2009 1:01 AM
Seriously, if this happens...I will renounce movie watching.
22. TOM P - November 27, 2009 5:00 AM
More decades stale 'inspiration' from -"We've already made our fortune
-but continue to pump-out circle-jerk junk" Hollywood.
Guess colluding with the most awesomely genocidal regime in
history---across the Pacific -takes its toll....