Sep 26 2007Jonas Brothers are Disney's New Hanson, Earth's New Evil
Following the success of other teen musical stars like Hannah Montana, the Cheetah Girls, those little assholes from High School Musical, and others I'm surely forgetting, Disney is setting its sights on making the Jonas Brothers the next Tiger Beat sensation.
Kevin, Joe, and Nick (your guess is as good as mine as to who's who) will star as the cleverly-titled J.O.N.A.S.--Junior Operatives Networking as Spies--who thwart evil while working undercover as a superstar teen rock band. The nation breathes a collective sigh of relief that someone is picking up the work of Josie and the P****cats, absent save for a brief appearance since 1972.
Next, these little shits will hit the big screen in Disney's Camp Rock playing, in a bit of a casting twist, a superstar teen rock band that helps out in a rock camp. It's something like School of Rock but without any of the charm, replacing that with the intention of getting 12-year-old girls off.
Disney also plans a televised concert for the little pricks, to be immediately followed by a worldwide psychological reassessment to determine exactly why we'd allow the creation of another Hanson.
Disney spree for Jonas sibs [Hollywood Reporter]
Reader Comments
1. Juan - September 26, 2007 2:22 PM
This is one of them articles where you can't tell where the news ends and the jokes begin, because Disney is scary crazy like that.
2. KeiKai - September 26, 2007 5:26 PM
i hate these guys. they played at my school when i was in 8th grade.
3. brblife.com - September 26, 2007 10:45 PM
WTFITS!!!
what kind of deals are going on at disney, that they would release this kind of evil upon mankind?
4. SandraB - September 28, 2007 12:19 PM
You sound very, very angry at this news. Here, take this happy blue pill, it will make you forget all about these little dinks.
5. Sylvia - September 30, 2007 3:45 PM
These guys wish they were another Hanson. Hanson have actual talent, and are still selling out shows ten years after their big hit. Think the Jonas brothers will be doing the same?
6. Jammie - January 2, 2008 9:13 PM
OKay IDK what your Problem is but if i where you get over it your just mad cause your not as HOTT & Famouse as them soooo get over your self & stop Cusing so much in your stuff cause lil kidds read this stuff thank you very much..oh & by the way the one on the Left Is Kevin, Nick Is in the middle, & Joe is on the right.... (if you know from your left & right you will figure it out..k)
Thanks,
7. Liz - February 2, 2008 7:00 PM
Um excuse me, but who are you to call the Jonas Brothers little shits?! Thats so messed up the Jonas Brothers are one of (NOTICE HOW I SAID ONE OF?!) the gratest pop-rock groups ever! GOT THAT?! EVER!!!!!!!
8. Shade - March 10, 2008 5:54 PM
Thank you to Jammie and Liz we all know that these nimrods are only envious because they would never be half as hot as Kevin, Nick , and Joe.
You guys have no right at all to be calling these boys little *&>#@!!!
They rock, and cut the cussing you jerks. If you are talking bad about the Jonas Brothers then nobody wants to hear from you.
9. JONAS FANS! - March 13, 2008 5:26 AM
u have no idea what ur talking about. seems to me u need a hug. u obviously dnt know crap about these boys and u shuldn't talk so much dirt. they are amazing vocally & unlike U they mean sumthing to lots of people. So dnt get it twistet cupcake. these boys rock. whether u or your physco friends wanna admitt it or not. UR PROB JEALOUS THAT HEY CAN ACTUALLY GET A GIRL!U all must feel pretty hard capping on some teenage boys!! These boys are not only great performers but they actually do the world sum good. HEY BUT THEN A GAIN "U GOTTA "BLESS THE ENEMIES & THANK THE HATERS!"
freakkin JERK. quit hating
&& hanson cant even compare!!
they had one hit & were never heard from again!
HUH SOUND FAMILIAR??
(( you! ONE HIT WONDER))
T H E J O N A S BROTHERS FREAKING ROCK!
U LIL SHITT, PRICK
think again!
bee otch.
DUCES!
then again.. one finger & im out. cus u dnt even deserve two.
10. jamie - March 16, 2008 10:07 AM
you guys don't even know what you are talking about the Jonas Brothers are the best just because their not rapping and cusing all the time in their music leave them alone they are better and more popular than you and your just really stupid
11. lucy - May 31, 2008 11:05 PM
never before have i read such obsurd remarks as yours. its painful to see that you can't seem to find the young group "the JONAS brothers" appealing but such comments as yours, and the intolerable language, are unacceptable and i'm suprised your work is not in question.
it is also true that many young people read these sites, and it is highly unbelievable that your person remarks are being allowed about. as wonderful as it would be, i doubt from your sense of anger and frustration to a young boy band-to whom i can only assume you envy in some way- retractions are highly encouraged to a working person such as yourself.
please check your attitude before writing another intollerable piece as it will be reported.
much appreciated,
Jonas Brothers fans...
12. Anti - January 15, 2009 6:45 PM
What is wrong with you fans, its like the guy insulted your mother or family, its just a rock group, you sound like a bunch of brainwashed 12 year olds, if he doesnt like the Jonas brothers who cares he doesnt have to like them
besides they are evil, listen to kids of the future backwards
13. Stéphanie - June 2, 2009 3:56 PM
hey.........
i want say of i love much theJONAS BROTHERS, and i am one big fan....
♥♥♥♥
love forever!!!
14. Stéphanie - June 2, 2009 4:09 PM
don't have someone of like more thats boys........
i am the big fan, and i love much......
the JONAS BROTHERS.
JB
joe and téh.....
love