Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix Poster

April 26, 2007 Comments

The one-sheet for the new Harry Potter film (above) documents an event rarely seen at all, yet alone in the poster of a children's movie: the Pedophile Temptation Gauntlet. Step 10 of the 11-step road to recovery, the Pedophile Temptation Gauntlet (PTG) must be successfully traversed without signs of visible arousal (yes, "half-wood" counts) before the pedophile can move on to the final step: not kidnapping and raping children.

Related Stories

ADVERTISEMENT
Adam Carolla Gets "Hammer"-ed (sigh)

You'd be smilin' too if you'd just punched this bitch in the face. Boy did she like to talk. The Hammer, the semi-autobiographical Adam Carolla picture premiers tonight at the Tribeca Film Festival. It doesn't yet appear to have...

April 26, 2007
Queen Latifah to Help Ruin All of Me Remake

Oh snap, I done fell again! Girl, I told you I can't walk in these shoes. In pointless remake news, New Line has signed Queen Latifah to topline a remake of "All of Me," the 1984 comedy that starred...

April 26, 2007
Blanchett is Dylan, Subterranean, Homesick

Though some smaller shots were previously leaked by Rolling Stone, this black and white shot of Cate Blanchett in Todd Haynes' Bob Dylan biopic really sells her in the part, even "avec ovaries." Richard Gere, Heath Ledger, Christian Bale,...

April 26, 2007
Rosie Leaves The View, But Never Leftovers

After just one season on the nation's favorite "ladies talkin'" show, The View, Rosie O'Donnell announced (in the above clip, prior to her picking things off Barbara's lip) that she could not settle on a contract and will be...

April 26, 2007
Fantastic Four Face Wilderness Threat

If one from a series of leaked production shots is any indication, the Fantastic Four's newest foe may come in the form of a large bear. Despite the supergroup's awesome abilities, which in this latest chapter pit them against...

April 26, 2007
Fantastic Four 2 International Posters

Marvel has chosen a daring new campaign direction with their international Fantastic Four 2 posters by showing awkward portraits of the characters. My main concern with these is that it might urge some people to think, "Hey, weren't these...

April 25, 2007
Brits: Hold the Grindhouse, Guvna

Via /Film: Due to the mediocre American box office take, The Weinstein Co have decided to put the film's U.K. release temporarily on hold. Rumor has it that the new plan is to release both films individually. Unnecessary, says...

April 25, 2007
Dark Knight Acquires Eric Roberts from Dark Night

After faking his death in a plane crash, Buddy Holly went on to star in a number of straight-to-video softcore porn movies. Eric Roberts, veteran of a million movies I haven't seen and current star of a couple TV...

April 25, 2007