Jan 19 2007Pirates of the Caribbean 3 Production Art
There's a collection of Pirates 3 production artwork over here that shows that they're really taking the "At World's End" subtitle literally (see above). I had foolishly been assuming it was more of an expression of exhaustion with the Pirates of the Caribbean, as in, "They're still looting and plundering? I'll tell ya, I am just at my world's end with these Pirates of the Caribbean."
Also of note: the exaggerated womanliness of Keira Knightly in the painting of her. She's naturally built like a 12-year-old state swimming champ, but he gives her a body from a Russ Meyer movie. I think he might be on to something.
Jan 19 2007Ewan McGregor as Kurt Cobain
Courtney Love has been toying with the idea of a Kurt Cobain movie for years, but now that she's got the rights to the biography Heavier Than Heaven, rumor is she's ready to move ahead with Ewan McGregor playing the part of the Nirvana frontman. My guess is she just saw Trainspotting and was so impressed by his ability to negotiate in and out of toilets (she has gotten stuck numerous times attempting similar drug-induced feats) that she just needed to work with him. And then have sex with him. And then a pony.
Jan 18 2007Sunshine Trailer
Hey, kids, it's Danny Boyle's Sunshine trailer!
Summary: The sun proves itself an unreliable son-of-a-bitch by deciding to burn out, and just when we were finally deciding solar energy was "maybe something to explore if we can make it oilier." Cillian Murphy & friends fly out to try to re-ignite it somehow. As usual, some drunk idiot tries pouring beer on it, assuming the alcohol will get things burning again. The sun ends up too wet to re-light.
Jan 18 2007MagConaughey P.I.
Big news from the UK's Teletext is that, pending his capture, the savage formerly known as Matthew McConaughey may be groomed and shirted in a Hawaiian print for the upcoming big screen remake of Magnum P.I. Better yet, he may be reunited, with Sahara co-stars Steve Zahn and William H. Macy with the two playing Rick and Higgins respectively (along with Tyrese Gibson as TC the chopper pilot). And they say lightning can't strike twice!
Sahara will always live on as perfection in casting, a once in a lifetime phenomenon that could not and should not be replicated for fear of cheapening it. The Sahara cast has even been regarded as "The Dream Team," "The Beatles of movie casts," and "Christ and his disciples playing dumbass desert adventurers." But if something's going to do it respect, giving a reason for the crew to reunite (with Tyrese replacing Penelope Cruz, as many felt should have been done in Sahara), it would definitely be a remake of a campy '80s series about a Hawaiian investigator with a mustache and Ferrari, written and directed by the Dodgeball guy.
Jan 18 2007Mr. Brooks Poster
In the poster for the Jekyll and Hyde-style psychological thriller Mr. Brooks, producers have found an innovative new way to market star Kevin Costner: turn him around so that hopefully people will think it's Alan Rickman.
Jan 17 2007Mutant Chronicles Teaser Poster
Q: How is best to advertise the movie The Mutant Chronicles?
A: With a mutant. Specifically, an arm that's been mutated into a sharp blade, suitable for impaling helmets, stabbing non-mutants, and mutant fondues. At least I think that's what this is.
Jan 17 2007Jenna Jameson Wants Scarlett Johansson
There was once a time when you could masturbate to pornographic lady-pictures without knowing who they were, just that they wanted their pink pussies pounded by your throbbing man member. Now, we expect a certain notoriety to our self-pleasure subjects before we'll relinquish our seed, giving rise to such stars as Jenna Jameson, Tera Patrick and, for a certain class of person, Wifey.
Bored with names, measurements, and favorite places to have a dildo shoved, we now demand even more personal information on the cum sluts, giving Jenna Jameson the impression that we want a movie about her actual life, sans gang bangs. In a recent interview with FHM, the "star" went further, saying she'd have Scarlett Johansson playing her.
Is this an unfounded rumor that will never turn up to be anything? Probably, but at least it's one you can masturbate to.
Jan 17 2007First AVP 2 Image
I don't know what I was expecting, but somehow this first image from Alien Versus Predator 2, while maintaining a strict adherance to the concept, is also utterly pathetic. Maybe it's that the Alien is hanging like an enamored girlfriend off the Predator's arm. Maybe it's that the flimsy rubber of the Alien suit is collapsing under the slight pressure of the Predator actor's hand. Or maybe I've just finally outgrown the notion of two characters from unrelated series duking it out in a story that strains to stretch an idiotic premise across an hour-and-a-half. That being said, if they make a movie where Superman fights Batman, or anything where werewolves fight zombies, it will be totally fucking sweet.
Jan 15 2007Golden Globes Coverage!
Golden Globes coverage in progress! It's like a big dumb prom with trinkets! See uninformed opinions below cut!
Jan 15 2007Flash Gordon on TV
According to this article, Flash Gordon will be the latest obsolete view of the future remade into a Sci Fi series, much to the delight of a small set of freaks at a comic convention and depression-era child time-travelers. Luckily, the previous incarnations of the franchise have been largely regarded as cheesy, low-budget, campy-at-best b-movies, leaving few changes to be made for a typical Sci Fi adaptation outside of the addition of Scott Bakula.
