Aug 2 2006Jackie Chan/Jet Li Team-Up Nearly Ready
Freddy vs. Jason, Alien vs. Predator, Batman vs. Superman, Penis vs. Vagina, and now Jackie Chan vs. Jet Li as the two kung fu cinema legends will finally share the the screen pending approval of a script, proving that if enough nerds keep talking about a fictional showdown, someone will eventually make it. Says Jack Chan:
All the hurdles have been overcome. The only problem left is the script. We need a script that he approves and I approve. If that goes well, shooting will start in March or April in Shanghai.
Luckily, I think I've got just the script for them. It starts with Jet Li fighting some guys, sometimes in slow motion. Eventually, Jackie Chan also fights some guys, but he hits some of them with kitchen appliances or other goofy things. Later, they team up to fight some more guys, leading up to a final fight with a blackbelt drug lord that killed some of their relatives. The last half hour is cuddling.
Reader Comments
1. uni'tard - August 2, 2006 12:57 PM
adorable
2. Praz - August 2, 2006 1:28 PM
What about Robocop vs. Terminator?
No seriously, prease don't make any more of these 'showdown' movies.
3. scottyDOO - August 3, 2006 9:02 AM
I don't think it will be Jackie vs. Jet. They're should be a team and play Pilots on the plane in "SNAKES ON A PLANE 2 - The Hatchlings" I can't wait to download the cam.
4. TehMaz - August 4, 2006 2:49 AM
How about "American Ninja realises hes white", where Jackie and Jet go on a hunt for this white guy who apparently kills thousands upon thousands of their namelss ninja friends. Some time he even gets a Black guy to help! omfg..
Anyway, They track him down to find Micheal Dudikoff in a wheel chair as the ultimate bad guy, but before they get to fight "the white cripple" they have to get through his seconds! This will of course be Chuck Norris and Van Damme. Eventually Jackie and Jet will beat them after 3 punches and 79 slow mo replays, at which point *just* as they are about to kick the cripples ass, the C4 under his chair goes off and he dies..
Everyone leaves happy, and just before the credits roll, u see these two hands draggin along a crippled body out of the rubble...waiting for the perfect sequel.
Which will inevitably star wesley snipes, and ted danson. Possibly a cameo from Van damme as his own evil twin.