Jul 7 2006Primetime Emmy Award Nominations Announced
The Academy of Television Arts & Sciences has spontaneously decided to nominate some television artists and scientists for some awards, in something they're calling "The Emmy Awards." 24 and Grey's Anatomy led the nominations with 12 and 11 respectively, meaning, to my grandfather, that 24 and Grey's Anatomy are the favorite shows of Jews and homosexuals, though I think a lot of his resentment stems from the Academy's repeated snubbing of old Bonanaza reruns.
See the full list of nominations here.
Jul 7 2006The Illusionist Trailer
This is no illusion (wink)-- the trailer for The Illusionist has been released on AOL Movies. In the preview, a renowned illusionist (Edward Norton) and a fetching princess (Jessica Biel) fall for each other when he uses her as a volunteer in his act. It's basically like when a woman becomes infatuated with her rapist. Or maybe it's nothing like that, and my levels of respect for magic and rape are just very similar.
Jul 7 2006Stop-Motion Christmas Coming to Life
As if severe asthma and parental alcoholism hadn't stolen enough of my Christmas joy, NBC is going to take the few enjoyable moments I had by remaking the classic Rankin/Bass 1974 stop-motion classic The Year Without a Santa Claus as a live-action special:
Ron Underwood (City Slickers) is directing the two-hour film, which will star John Goodman as Santa. Also cast are Ethan Suplee (NBC's My Name Is Earl), Chris Kattan, Eddie Griffin and Carol Kane. Larry Wilson and Tom Martin wrote the script.
The movie will tell the story of a disgruntled St. Nick who decides to take the year off from delivering presents and ultimately rediscovers the meaning of the holiday through the help of a young boy.
I don't know why they're possibly remaking this. The charm in these specials was almost entirely their animation. It's not as if the plots were so impressive that they warrant a re-envisioning of the material. It's like remaking Joan Rivers as a natural beauty. Sure, I can see how it might look nicer, but really, it's only the weird fake parts making her tolerable.
Jul 7 2006French Snakes on a Plane Poster
From what I can tell, this French version of the Snakes on a Plane poster is just hacked together from some production stills, and, from the way Sam Jackson's holding that Taser, possibly a Star Wars screenshot with a leather jacket drawn over Mace Windu. But somehow the parenthetical "Snakes on a Plane" below the title makes up for all of that.
Jul 6 2006Snakes on a Plane International Trailer
As much as it prides us to think so, particularly during this patriotic month, the danger of snakes on planes is not purely an American affair. Snakes can get on any flight, international or domestic, and this international trailer for Snakes on a Plane proves it.
The main difference is that in the domestic version, those who placed the snakes, as well as the snakes themselves, are viewed as hostile terrorists that must be stopped at all (motherfuckin') costs. In this foreign version, Samuel L. Jackson praises the valiant patriotism of these brave snakes, risking life and lack of limb to strike back at the planes of our enemies, the rest of the world. Heroes on a plane, my friends. Heroes on a motherfuckin' plane.
Jul 6 2006Spider-Man 3 Plot Secret
Ut-oh! Spoilers! Some new pictures have surfaced from the shooting of Spider-Man 3, revealing what may be a crucial plot point from the new film. So if you want to know the scoop, click the link below. If not, move back to the safety net of your mother's arms, wuss.
Jul 6 2006Hollywoodland Trailer
The drama of Hollywood murder is no longer relegated to the TV movie thanks to Hollywoodland, which explores the mysterious death of 50s "Superman" star George Reeves (Ben Affleck). Adrien Brody, as a private detective, investigates if Reeves' death was a suicide or if he was shot in slow-motion in the eye, the most common form of Superman shootings.
Jul 5 2006Running With Scissors Trailer
Take a break from yesterday's drudgery of patriotism with the trailer to Running With Scissors, based on the best-selling true story of Augusten Burroughs, his strange family, and the even stranger psychiatrist that takes him in. If you like quirky divorce comedies, and want to ignore that The Royal Tenenbaums and The Squid and the Whale already exist, make sure to check this out. This shit reeks so hard of desperate quirkiness, even Zach Braff would check the other stalls before dropping this stinker.
Jul 5 2006Daft Punk's Electroma Teaser Trailer
The teaser trailer for the French duo Daft Punk's directorial debut Electroma has made its way into God's loving heart (YouTube). If the previous images of Electroma left you asking, "What the hell?", this teaser will answer with "I have no fucking clue. Something to do with robots, I guess."
Jul 5 2006The Silver Surfer Will Be Played By Computers
According to Moviehole, not only are the rumors about Vin Diesel playing the Silver Surfer in the second Fantastic Four movie untrue, but the Surfer won't even be played by a human, with director Tim Story opting for an all CGI design.
The film's director, Tim Story, told me this morning that although The Silver Surfer is indeed in the movie, it won't be Vin Diesel playing him.
"No truth to it", Story said, when asked about the Diesel rumours. "The Surfer will be a new CGI design being developed especially for the movie. It's going to be incredible."
The CGI system being developed to make a man appear to be made of silver is so sophisticated, it's being codenamed, "The same crap they did for T-1000 in Terminator 2." At least by me.
As a condolence to Vin, I'd like to point out that it's probably only going to help your career to not to play a silver alien that rides on a surfboard. Yes, it worked for Brando, but he's Brando.
