Jun 2 2006Accepted Trailer
The newest teen comedy sensation is certain to be Accepted, starring that kid from Ed who now stars in commercials as a personified hipster Macintosh. After he's rejected from every college he applies to, Macintosh decides to invent one, even going so far as to allow other students to enroll. They create their own curriculum, with clever subjects like looking at tits, and even enlist a token funny fat kid. If you loved Weird Science, but wished the beautiful woman was replaced with a technical institute, this is the one for you. And it's your lucky day: the trailer's online!
Jun 1 2006Michael Bay's Transformers in Car Mode
The first shots of the robot characters from Michael Bay's Transformers have rolled in, but unfortunately they're all in their "car forms," meaning what you're left with is just some pictures of cars. In an effort to infuriate fans, Bay has already begun changing the makes and models of the vehicles. Bumblebee, the popular character who transformed into a Volkswagen Beetle, is now said to be the above car, a Chevrolet Camaro. Also, instead of being a Pisces interested in long walks and fly fishing, he's now a Libra bicycle hobbyist with a "flair for the unusual."
I don't see the point of changing the characters like this, but then again, I never understood why they transformed in the first place. Couldn't most of the robots fly, anyway? Why turn into a car? You're just restricting yourself. Particularly the guy who turned into a tape player. What is he doing as a tape player that he can't do as a robot holding a tape player? If you want a tape player, just bring a tape player. Simple as that.
See more cars here.
Jun 1 2006Clooney, Ziyi, and Yen in Seven Samurai
Already remade as a western in 1960, Harvey Weinstein is set to remake Akira Kurosawa's The Seven Samurai yet again, this time, it seems, retaining the samurai aspects:
Hong Kong action star Donnie Yen is set to lead in the Hollywood remake of Japanese classic "The Seven Samurai", alongside George Clooney and Chinese starlet Zhang Ziyi, a film company said.
George Clooney as a samurai is perfect casting. Remember all those times on ER that he'd perform surgery with a sword? Or how, on Roseanne, Booker would go on those tirades about honor? Or in Syriana, how he was fatter and had a beard? During those times, I always thought, "This guy would be a hell of a samurai."
Jun 1 2006Hard Candy Poster
The new poster for Hard Candy, the story of a 14-year-old girl's attempt to seduce and expose a pedophile she meets on the Internet, really captures the spirit and plot of the film in a single image. The only thing that's missing is Chris Hansen and the rest of the Dateline: To Catch a Predator crew. Has anyone else been watching this thing? On the one hand, it frightens and disgusts me to know there are these creeps out there, but at the same time, seeing them on television is reassuring. You can tell what to look for. Outdated glasses, sleeveless shirts, and creepy facial hair don't necessarily make someone a pedophile, but they're clearly good indicators of that "pedophile style."
May 31 2006More Superman Returns Posters
Some new posters for Superman Returns have been released. One depicts a romantic moment between Lois and Superman, lit with the soft glow of an old Hollywood film of the 40's. The other shows Lex Luthor holding a piece of Kryptonite, only instead of using Kevin Spacey, they've just drawn some bags under the eyes of a Charlie Brown cartoon. In this scene, Luthor has decided to borrow from the sinister plans of one of his peers, holding out the Kryptonite until Superman is just about to kick it, then pulling it away real fast.
See the cutesy one under the cut.
May 31 2006Snakes on a Plane Teaser Trailer
The Snakes on a Plane teaser trailer is here. Right now, all that's available online is a bootleg copy taped off the movie screen, but if you're a true Snakes on a Plane devotee, it won't matter. The video is pretty hard to discern after the titles, so let me offer what I can make out. It looks like some kind of tube-like creatures attacking a large vehicle of some nature.
Hopefully, they'll also work on the sound effects before release. Right now, these snakes sound a lot like a fat guy holding a video camera, chuckling at the screen.
NOTE: Because of its bootleg origins, there's probably a good chance this will go down.
May 31 2006Michael Bay Blogs Transformers Update
For those who didn't know, Michael Bay, director of such classics as Armageddon and Pearl Harbor, is currently cranking away at his next American masterpiece: Transformers, the dramatic story of transforming robots. And even more exciting, he's blogging! And he says the film is going splendidly:
We finished our first week. One of the best first weeks on a movie I've ever experienced. We shot over 250 set ups.
250 setups for the week seems like a pretty strong shooting week, particularly because, if I know Michael Bay, that means about 50 slow-motion shots of walking towards the camera and the rest as 360 degree pans.
May 31 2006Apocalypto One-Sheet
Fans of dejected Mayans: I've got good news. Normally, when you hoped to see a dejected Mayan, it meant first going out to find a Mayan with low self-esteem, then insulting his culture, reminding him of its downfall, telling him his calendar wasn't that great, etc. Now, thanks to the poster for Mel Gibson's Apocalypto, you can bring the experience home without the hassle. Look at the posture of this poor fellow. You can tell he's real dejected, just how you like 'em.
May 30 2006Final Superman Returns Trailer
The final Superman Returns trailer is here to enjoy in the over-compressed glory of YouTube. It's been playing before some showings of X-Men 3, so you most likely saw it this weekend, when every person on earth saw that movie. This trailer focuses more on the diabolical plans of the villainous Lex Luthor, though they still manage to squeeze in the bullshit with the bullet hitting him in the eye. Sure, it's impressive to flatten a bullet with your cornea, but can he bend the tongs of a fork as it stabs him in the testicles? Probably, but we're only going to know for sure if they show us.
May 30 2006Strangers with Candy Second Trailer
Everyone's favorite boozer, user, and loser, Jerri Blank (Amy Sedaris), returns to high school in the prequel to the Comedy Central television series of the same name, Strangers with Candy. Take a look at the longer, funnier trailer now available. Who would have thought the life of an alcoholic, drug-addicted convict would look so fun? Robert Downey, Jr. I suppose. He bet quite a bit on that one.
May 30 2006Spider-Man 3: Eddie Brock and Black Suit Spy Pics
Shooting for Spider-Man 3 has been hitting the streets of New York as of late, allowing pedestrians to capture some spy images. Thanks to some brave citizens, we now have a shot of Tobey Maguire as Peter Parker, revealing the new black suit under his clothes, as well as a shot of Topher Grace as rival-reporter and future-enemy Venom, Eddie Brock. Here's what I've gathered from the images:
It looks like if the black suit is a shape-shifting alien symbiote in the movie, it probably doesn't make-up all of his clothes, just the Spidey costume. It does, however, give him long, greasy hair. Sort of the "guy at the IT desk" look. I think Richard Belzer is next to him.
Eddie Brock looks like kind of a douche. Bleached hair? Come on.
May 30 2006Ghost Rider Effects Update
In response* to my complaints about the effects in the Ghost Rider trailer, Marvel has put up some stills of more skeletons and motorcycles on fire. They look a little better than what was in the teaser trailer, but we'll see how that actually pans out once it's put in motion. If you ask me, the only way we're going to get a realistic flaming skull is to set a real one on fire, then have a couple little dwarves or something in the suit and set it on them. I know a guy who can get the skulls, and for an extra $20 he won't tell you their name or what he did to them. It's usually worth it.
*Not a direct response. I'm largely ignored.
May 30 2006X-Men 3 Makes Most Money Ever
Despite all the nay-saying and skepticism from many fans and critics, X-Men: The Last Stand showed this holiday weekend that Americans will pay anything to see Kelsey Grammer covered in hair, with the film bringing in $120.1 million, the largest holiday opening ever. The huge number showed that audiences are still willing to go to theaters, a notion supported by other relatively large openings like An Inconvenient Truth. Despite opening on only four screens in New York and LA, the global warming documentary was able to bring in an estimated $365,787, providing a healthy nest to fuel the "X3 Bonfire" following the premier.
